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OUR COLUMNIST CONTEST: WE HAVE SOME WINNERS.- - - - Thank you for your patience regarding the announcement of our Columnist Contest winners. The sheer number and quality of the entries semi-overwhelmed and excited us, and it took just a bit longer than expected to give everyone the consideration we felt they deserved. Because we aren't able to contact every submitter, before we go ahead and introduce the winners (below) we thought we'd try to provide at least a little behind the scenes information that may be of interest to submitters and readers. The overall quality of the submissions was unbelievably high. Almost never did we open an entry and immediately get the sense that it wasn't a contender. The vast majority of entries merited close consideration which made the decision difficult, but which we're also very grateful for since it made for interesting reading. Total number of entries: 812 This includes a couple of entries where people wanted to enter, but didn't want to create an entry and just sent us links to something they'd already written. While we admit that we clicked on these links out of curiosity, we decided early on to stick to our own guidelines and declared those ineligible, so let's call it more like 809. Percentage of entries that came in within 48 hours of final deadline: Approximately 80. This shouldn't have surprised us, but it did. Most popular themes/approaches: By far the most common approach was to propose writing an advice column. These took on every shape and size and we enjoyed many of them, but in the end, none of those chosen are advice columns because upon full consideration, we had the sense that there are enough advice columns. The second most common approach is what we'll call the "I hate stuff and want to write about it," column. There were probably about fifteen of these and once again, provided enjoyable reading, but in the end, it felt like − to us anyway − that there's a limited pleasure in hearing about what someone else hates. In short, for us, a little goes a long way. Number of "finalists": 33 The selection involved a sort of sifting process. The first step was to read through each entry and sort them into virtual piles "Yes" (meaning we want to consider this further), "No" (meaning we don't intend to consider this further) and, "Maybe," (we're not sure if we want to consider this further). The "Maybe" pile was then indeed considered further with each of those entries then winding up in either the "Yes" or "No" pile. To give you sense of how this broke down, about 170 of the 809 wound up in the "Yes" or "Maybe" piles. After further consideration and consultation, these were narrowed down to the thirty-three that were labeled (internally) as "finalists." This is where it got tough. If you'll recall, we initially intended to award three $500 prizes. We had thirty-three that we could easily picture finding a comfortable home on our page. This seemed like an impossible task, and it was, which is why we are announcing not three, but seven prizewinners. We wish it was possible to give a platform to all of those thirty-three finalists, but time and space does not permit. We were able to provide the (admittedly thin) solace of letting them know that they were at least close. The prize-winning selections: Conversations at a Wartime Café Dispatches From a Guy Trying Unsuccessfully to Sell a Song in Nashville Bitchslap: A Column About Women and Fighting Dispatches From an Indian Casino Chris White Answers Profound Questions About the Presidents The Conflicted Existence of a Female Porn Writer Oh My Gawd: A Column About a Teenager Navigating Religion Big things ahead! Starting in September we will be introducing you to our new columnists on these very virtual pages. For now, we just want to say, congratulations to the winners and thank you to everyone who entered. - - - - OTHER McSWEENEY'S FEATURES: - - - - Our Columnist Contest: We Have Some WinnersIt's Weird to Think That One Day I'll Photoshop You Out of These Very Vacation Photos By Colin Nissan Excerpts From Induction Speeches Into The Taxidermy Hall of Fame By Jon Methven I Challenge You to the Ultimate Event in Manly Competition By Steven Markow Journal of a New COBRA Recruit By Keith Pille |
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