George Washington was made entirely of wood. (Not as uncommon as one would think for those times.)

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John Adams, notorious for writing long letters to his wife Abigail, would occasionally write them in the blood of his enemies.

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Thomas Jefferson would take his breakfast in the bathtub and would subsequently bathe in the kitchen sink like a newborn baby. (Some Virginia Universities still incorporate this practice into fraternity initiations, referring to it as “Jefferson-ing.”)

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Never actually elected, Benjamin Franklin was the President of the United States for three months in 1789. It was just a weird thing that happened. Nobody noticed at the time.

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James Madison was known to friends as “Jimbo," to others as “Jimmy the Prez,” and to a very select few as “Mad Man Jim, Lady Killer of Montpelier."

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Completely blind from the day he was born, James Monroe would fake the ability to see by sort of vaguely describing things. For example saying a piece of furniture was “kind of modern in a way but also very much traditional.”

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John Quincy Adams was inspired to be President not by his father as many believe but instead by Bill Pullman’s portrayal of a president in the 1996 film Independence Day.

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Contrary to what most “historians” will tell you, Andrew Jackson appeared on the $20 bill BEFORE becoming President. In fact, it was his appearance on the bill that made him so popular amongst the electorate.

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Martin Van Buren invented the “Double Dutch” style of jumping rope and used to play it with friends on the White House lawn.

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William Henry Harrison’s real name was actually Harrison William Henry, but when printed on the ballot incorrectly, he decided to spare the printer any embarrassment and just kept it the way it was. And frankly he never thought he’d be elected anyway, so he didn’t think it would be an issue.

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John Tyler could not feel pain.

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The only language James K. Polk could speak was German. It was more than a little problematic throughout his political career.

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Zachary Taylor was born to a family of buffalo and raised as such.

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Millard Fillmore’s favorite newspaper comic strip was Cathy. Just kidding, it was Mallard Fillmore.

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It was not until the third year of his first term that Franklin Pierce was made aware that he was the President. Until then he just thought everyone was being super nice to him and didn’t understand why.

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This one everyone now knows, but James Buchanan was actually one child standing atop the shoulders of another child, pretending to be a grown-up. They got away with it by always wearing long coats.

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There’s a great deal of scholarship on Abraham Lincoln, but one fact that’s often overlooked is that he was only visible to people who closed their eyes and wished hard enough to see him.

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Andrew Johnson was impeached from office after it was discovered that he was part of a Civil War reenactment society. This was in extremely poor taste at the time.

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Ulysses S. Grant changed his name from Hiram Ulysses Grant because he felt Hiram sounded a bit too Jewish.

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Like Josiah Bartlet and Andrew Shepherd, Rutherford B. Hayes is a fictitious President created by Aaron Sorkin.

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James A. Garfield hated Mondays and loved lasagna.

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Many years after his presidency, Chester A. Arthur worked in marketing for a cheese-flavored snack called “Cheetos,” dressing as a character named Chester Cheetah.

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While he told people his favorite poet was Walt Whitman, Grover Cleveland secretly couldn’t get enough of Shel Silverstein.

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Benjamin Harrison has never heard of you either.

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When things got too stressful, William McKinley would unwind by doing the People magazine crossword puzzle.

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A physical fitness fanatic, Theodore Roosevelt would stay athletic and sharp by hunting and killing one man every day of his presidency.

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It’s a commonly held myth that because of his size William Howard Taft once got stuck inside a bathtub. While this is technically true, it’s not the whole story. The whole story is far too sick and twisted to put into writing. Suffice it to say that sitting naked in extra-strength glue is a very real and very dangerous fetish.

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Woodrow Wilson single-handedly won World War I. You should have seen him out there, too. It was crazy.

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Warren G. Harding thought he was applying to be President of his local Rotary Club, but once elected President of the United States, he figured he’d just roll with it.

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After his presidency, Calvin Coolidge spent the remaining few years of his life trying to convince American teenagers to describe things they like as “Coolidge.” He did not succeed and frankly the teens were pretty creeped out by the whole thing.

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We could use a man like Herbert Hoover again.

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Franklin D. Roosevelt originally wanted to call the New Deal the “Deal-o-Matic,” but was fortunately talked out of it.

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To make extra money on the side, Harry Truman used to make appearances at Billy Joel conventions along with Doris Day, Johnnie Ray, Walter Winchell, and Joe DiMaggio, signing autographs, meeting fans, etc.

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Due to his popularity at the time, God made it so all babies, when they’re first born, look just like Dwight D. Eisenhower, a tradition which holds to this very day.

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John F. Kennedy took his last name from the 1990s MTV VJ of the same name.

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By the end of his presidency, Lyndon Johnson had learned how to overpower the moon and control the tides using his mind.

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Richard Nixon was the first President to announce his candidacy at a Buffalo Wild Wings restaurant (the Sherman Oaks, California location to be exact).

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Gerald Ford referred to his administration as the “Ford Fiesta,” embracing the concept so fully, he purchased a brand new Ford Fiesta for everyone on staff.

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Jimmy Carter is only 3’ 7” tall, but with the use of great lighting and neat camera tricks, he’s made to look normal height on TV.

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Ronald Reagan’s S&M safe word was “jellybean.” He rarely used it.

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Normally a viewer of Good Morning America, George H.W. Bush often pretends to have seen the Today Show segments that his granddaughter Jenna does. If it seems she’s starting to question him about the details, he pretends he’s old and confused, even going so far as to call her Barbara.

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Bill Clinton is and always has been part Doberman Pinscher.

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Had he not been elected President, George W. Bush says he would have either wanted to be an astronaut, a fireman, or a police officer.

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Barack Obama never even considered being President until he saw that guy from Major League play the President on the TV show 24.