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Dave Eggers' The Wild Things is available for preorder, in regular hardcover and
limited-edition fur-covered.

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S H O R T   I M A G I N E D M O N O L O G U E S . - - - - L O C A L   R A D I O   S T A T I O N ' S " ' 8 0 s   H O U R"   W A N T S A   S E C O N D   C H A N C E BY LINDSAY HUNTER - - - - (5/12/04) I remember how it used to be, and I realize how much I miss you. You lost a lot when you lost me. I'm going to make a change; it's going to feel real good. I'm going to be a man in motion. I take a look in the mirror. I want to change my clothes, my hair, my face. I thought that pain and truth were the things that really mattered. But you can't stay here with every single hope you have shattered. I know what it means to walk along the lonely street of dreams. What a pity, you don't understand. I'm going to make you see that there's nobody else here. But your empty eyes pass me by and leave me. I gotta have faith. I would go out tonight, but your kiss is on my lips, and I haven't got a stitch to wear. I want to know what love is. I want you to show me. How can I forget you, when there is always something? Baby, where did our love go? Come and save me tonight. I want to dance with somebody who loves me. Let me be your private dancer. My God, what have I done? A man can tell a thousand lies, but I've kept it hidden well. Please don't go. You got what I need. If you want it, you got it. As long as we've got each other. Is this the end of the world as we know it? Hush, hush. Keep it down now. What have you done for me lately? I drove all night to get to you. Is that alright? I would walk five hundred miles just to be the man. My hands are tied. Nothing to win, nothing left to lose. If you leave, don't leave now. Who's going to drive you home? There doesn't seem to be anyone around. I'll be watching you; it's my prerogative. I'm on the hunt. I'm after you. Get out of my dreams. Get into my car. All I ever wanted, all I ever needed, is here in my car. I know this much is true. With or without you, I can't live. I'd be better off dead than to live without you. Make it easy on yourself. I'll make you fall for me, I promise you. Please, please, please, let me get what I want. This time. - - - - CURRENT SHORT IMAGINED MONOLOGUES

- - - - MAIN PAGE | ARCHIVES Memories of Amanda Davis Red dot denotes content that is new today. Black dot denotes newish content. McSWEENEY'S STORE SUBSCRIBE TO: McSWEENEY'S THE BELIEVER WHOLPHIN FUTURE McSWEENEY'S BOOKS THE AMANDA DAVIS HIGHWIRE FICTION AWARD INVITE A McSWEENEY'S AUTHOR TO SPEAK IN YOUR TOWN OR COLLEGE THE BEST AMERICAN NONREQUIRED READING McSWEENEY'S MONTHLY MAILING LIST BOOKSTORES WITH A McSWEENEY'S DISPLAY McSWEENEY'S-RELATED EVENTS AND VARIOUS TOUR DATES ORDER INQUIRIES AND ADDRESS CHANGES SUBMISSION GUIDELINES: FOR BOOKS FOR THE QUARTERLY FOR THE WEBSITE FOR WHOLPHIN McSWEENEY'S INTERNSHIPS CONTACT US - - - - LETTERS TO McSWEENEY'S LISTS McSWEENEY'S PREDICTS McSWEENEY'S RECOMMENDS NEW WHOLPHIN FILM DAN LIEBERT, VERBAL CARTOONIST TEDDY WAYNE'S UNPOPULAR PROVERBS REVIEWS OF NEW FOOD DISPATCHES FROM MANILA DISPATCHES FROM MOSCOW AND HERE'S THE KICKER: MIKE SACKS'S CONVERSATIONS WITH HUMOR WRITERS SARAH WALKER SHOWS YOU HOW DISPATCHES FROM AN ENVIRONMENTAL LAWYER WHO IS TRYING TO GROW A MUSTACHE DISPATCHES FROM A HANGDOG BANKRUPT DISPATCHES FROM THE ANACOSTIA DISPATCHES FROM THE CAPITAL DISPATCHES FROM INDIA THE WINNER'S CIRCLE WITH ERIC FEEZELL BEN GREENMAN'S FAKE CELEBRITY MUSICALS SEAN MICHAELS LISTENS TO MUSIC IN MONTREAL SHORT IMAGINED MONOLOGUES KIDS' LETTERS TO PRESIDENT OBAMA STAINED TEETH: A COLUMN ABOUT WINE DISPATCHES FROM THE WINGS AT THE BALLET YOUR MONEY, YOUR JOB ... YOUR LIFE, WITH ALISON ROSEN KEVIN DOLGIN TELLS YOU ABOUT PLACES YOU SHOULD GO IN EUROPE LAWRENCE WESCHLER'S EVERYTHING THAT RISES: A BOOK OF CONVERGENCES THE CONVERGENCES CONTEST ABOUT THE CONVALESCENT ABOUT GOD SAYS NO ABOUT UNDERGROUND AMERICA ABOUT THANKS AND HAVE FUN RUNNING THE COUNTRY LETTERS FROM AN EARTH BALL TO, OR CONCERNING, SEAN HANNITY DISPATCHES FROM ADJUNCT FACULTY AT A LARGE STATE UNIVERSITY E-MAILS SENT TO THE UNIVERSITY OF ALABAMA ENGLISH DEPARTMENT FLAG-FOOTBALL TEAM ADVICE FROM A PERSON WITH A BACHELOR'S DEGREE IN PSYCHOLOGY JOHN MOE'S POP-SONG CORRESPONDENCES INTERVIEWS WITH PEOPLE WHO HAVE INTERESTING OR UNUSUAL JOBS FLIP: A COLUMN ABOUT SKATEBOARDING OPEN LETTERS TO PEOPLE OR ENTITIES WHO ARE UNLIKELY TO RESPOND DISPATCHES FROM A PUBLIC LIBRARIAN MICHAEL IAN BLACK IS A VERY FAMOUS CELEBRITY DAN KENNEDY SOLVES YOUR PROBLEMS WITH PAPER STEPHEN ELLIOTT'S POKER REPORT - - - - ADDITIONAL MATERIAL