Timothy McSweeney's Header Image

Reverie.

BY MICHAEL QUATTRONE

- - - -

 Another year, another poetry convention.
 The Formalists are here in tar-black neckwear; 
 the Freebies, the Ranters, the Contemplators gather
 in the wet bar for Absinthe and Apollinaire. 
 Tomorrow and tomorrow and tomorrow: 
 three days of lectures at which to network. 

 If I could watch it from home on a network, 
 I would. Now there's a terrific invention—
 The Poetry Channel: "The Versed of Tomorrow
 Today!" An exposé on Elizabethan neckwear, 
 and Who Wants to Marry Apollinaire? 
 Not much of a market, from what I gather. 

 Usually I come to these meetings together
 with my poetry patron, whose net worth
 exceeds that of your average millionaire, 
 but she just married Jesus in a convent on
 the outskirts of Mamaroneck. Where
 that is, who the hell knows? Ask me tomorrow

 and I'll probably say, "Ask me tomorrow." 
 Maybe I should go to Mamaroneck to get her, 
 but nuns are such creatures of habit: that neckwear, 
 those habits. It's a whole religious network, 
 I swear. They probably go to Christ conventions, 
 and I bet you can watch them appall on the air. 

 I'd like to see CNN take a poll on air
 to end the suspense, or at least to narrow
 it down: who throws a better convention, 
 nuns or poets? If not, we could gather
 our own data to post on the Net, work
 out a contest (or some kind of picnic) where

 nuns and poets would neck, wear
 each other's clothing, pray to Apollo, Nair
 each other's genitals. Stockings (fishnet) work
 well for me, too. I know—let's do it tomorrow! 
 That way my patron won't think I forgot her. 
 All Holy Sisters in the convent: shun

 your vows to marry Christ (né Queer)! 
 All Horny Goatherds to Apollo: ne'er
 fear! This is Divine Intervention at work! 

 

MORE SESTINAS

 

- - - -

MAIN PAGE   |   ARCHIVES

 

Memories of Amanda Davis

 


Red dot denotes content that is new today.

Black dot denotes newish content.

McSWEENEY'S STORE

SUBSCRIBE TO:
McSWEENEY'S
THE BELIEVER
WHOLPHIN

FUTURE McSWEENEY'S BOOKS

THE AMANDA DAVIS HIGHWIRE FICTION AWARD

INVITE A McSWEENEY'S AUTHOR TO SPEAK IN YOUR TOWN OR COLLEGE

McSWEENEY'S MONTHLY MAILING LIST

McSWEENEY'S-RELATED EVENTS AND VARIOUS TOUR DATES

ORDER INQUIRIES AND ADDRESS CHANGES

SUBMISSION GUIDELINES:
FOR BOOKS
FOR THE QUARTERLY
FOR THE WEBSITE
FOR WHOLPHIN

McSWEENEY'S INTERNSHIPS

CONTACT US

- - - -

LETTERS TO McSWEENEY'S

LISTS

McSWEENEY'S PREDICTS

McSWEENEY'S RECOMMENDS

NEW WHOLPHIN FILM

DAN LIEBERT, VERBAL CARTOONIST

JOKES BY BRIAN BEATTY

REVIEWS OF NEW FOOD

DISPATCHES FROM MOSCOW

SO YOU WANT TO BE PRESIDENT?

DISPATCHES FROM THE ANACOSTIA

THE WINNER'S CIRCLE WITH ERIC FEEZELL

BEN GREENMAN'S FAKE CELEBRITY MUSICALS

DISPATCHES FROM A HUMANITARIAN JOURNALIST

DISPATCHES FROM IRAQ

SHORT IMAGINED MONOLOGUES

PHILIP GRAHAM SPENDS A YEAR IN LISBON

STAINED TEETH: A COLUMN ABOUT WINE

DISPATCHES FROM THE NAPOLEONIC WARS AT THE MET

KEVIN DOLGIN TELLS YOU ABOUT PLACES YOU SHOULD GO IN EUROPE

SONGS OF ENEMIES AND DESERTS: LIVING WITH THE SUDAN LIBERATION ARMY

LAWRENCE WESCHLER'S EVERYTHING THAT RISES: A BOOK OF CONVERGENCES

THE CONVERGENCES CONTEST

ABOUT WHAT IS THE WHAT

ABOUT BOWL OF CHERRIES

ABOUT COMEDY BY THE NUMBERS

ABOUT JOHN BRANDON'S ARKANSAS

ABOUT MICHAEL CHABON'S MAPS AND LEGENDS

LETTERS FROM AN EARTH BALL TO, OR CONCERNING, SEAN HANNITY

DISPATCHES FROM ADJUNCT FACULTY AT A LARGE STATE UNIVERSITY

ADVICE FROM A PERSON WITH A BACHELOR'S DEGREE IN PSYCHOLOGY

DISPATCHES FROM THE NBA ENTERTAINMENT LEAGUE

JOHN MOE'S POP-SONG CORRESPONDENCES

B.R. COHEN'S ANNALS OF SCIENCE

INTERVIEWS WITH PEOPLE WHO HAVE INTERESTING OR UNUSUAL JOBS

OPEN LETTERS TO PEOPLE OR ENTITIES WHO ARE UNLIKELY TO RESPOND

DISPATCHES FROM A PUBLIC LIBRARIAN

MICHAEL IAN BLACK IS A VERY FAMOUS CELEBRITY

DISPATCHES FROM ROY KESEY, AN AMERICAN GUY MARRIED TO
A PERUVIAN DIPLOMAT LIVING IN CHINA


STEPHEN ELLIOTT'S POKER REPORT

- - - -

ADDITIONAL MATERIAL