McSWEENEY'S INTERNET TENDENCY'S PATREON
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Articles by
John Jodzio
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May 16, 2019I Hide Gold Doubloons In My Baby’s Thigh Folds
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July 22, 2015An Excerpt from My Court Ordered Gardening Blog: Pickling Tips
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October 23, 2012My Roomba Won’t Stop Boning My Geode
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October 19, 2011Crafting Really Takes My Mind Off My Troubles
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August 3, 2011My Codpiece Smells Like Soup
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March 23, 2011Recently I Passed a Kidney Stone That Looked Like a Shark’s Tooth
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April 2, 2008The Monroe Family Bed Wishes to Die
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January 9, 2007James, I Cannot Even Begin To Imagine Who Threw A Bag Full Of Feces Into Your Dishwasher
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August 12, 2005A Toast to Randy, the Oldest Son in My Secret Family
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February 10, 2025Voting for the Mayor Who Promised to Blow Up the City Doesn’t Mean I Approve of the Mayor Blowing Up the City
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February 13, 2025Finally, My Tax Dollars Are Being Used to Uncover Publicly Available Government Information
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February 5, 2025Here at DOGE, We’ve Streamlined Every Aspect of America’s Collapse
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February 4, 2025An Accurate Organizational Chart of Your University
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February 21, 2025Don’t Tread on Me—Unless You’re a Billionaire with a Ketamine Addiction, in Which Case I Enthusiastically Support It
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February 21, 2025Excerpts from The Believer: Finding Win Ng
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February 21, 2025Why I Chose to Reenter the Matrix and Be a Living Battery for the Machines
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February 20, 2025Take Him Seriously, Not Literally