Klingon
Fairy Tales.
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"Goldilocks Dies With Honor at the Hands of the Three Bears"
"Snow White and the Six Dwarves She Killed With Her Bare Hands and the Seventh Dwarf She Let Get Away as a Warning to Others"
"There Was an Old Woman Who Lived in a Shoe With a Big Spike on It"
"The Three Little Pigs Build an Improvised Explosive Device and Deal With That Damned Wolf Once and for All"
"Jack and the Giant Settle Their Differences With Flaming Knives"
"Old Mother Hubbard, Lacking the Means to Support Herself With Honor, Sets Her Disruptor on Self-Destruct and Waits for the Inevitable"
"Mary Had a Little Lamb. It Was Delicious"
"Little Red Riding Hood Strays Into the Neutral Zone and Is Never Heard From Again, Although There Are Rumors ... Awful, Awful Rumors"
"Hansel and Gretel Offend Vlad the Impaler"
"The Hare Foolishly Lowers His Guard and Is Devastated by the Tortoise, Whose Prowess in Battle Attracts Many Desirable Mates"
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OTHER McSWEENEY'S FEATURES:
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Klingon Fairy Tales By Mike Richardson-Bryan
Alfred Hitchcock Complains About His Hotel Room By Andrew Meek
The Weekly Column of a Local-Newspaper Ombudsman Attempting to Communicate His Marital Frustrations Through His Work By Michael Ward
"Save Our Forests" Symposium, Day 1: Opening Remarks By José Avelino Gilles Corbett Lourenço
Thirty-Nine Questions for Charlie Daniels Upon Hearing "The Devil Went Down to Georgia" for the First Time in 25 Years By John Moe
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