Dear DirecTV:
I have noted with concern your recent advertising campaign, in which laudatory letters from ordinary consumers are read by celebrities such as John Goodman, Andy Garcia, and Danny DeVito.
The essence of the testimonial letter is to honor the expression of the everyday individual. It is emblematic of the American spirit, that all men are created equal. In terms of literary forebears, it stands proudly with the works of Mark Twain, Walt Whitman, and William Saroyan.
Your commercials, however, focus not on the common man, but on the celebrity. The emphasis is not on the experience of the user, but the performance of the reader—someone who, for all we know, has no experience with the product, but someone who we do know has made a career of presenting the false face.
You do a disservice to people such as myself and my friends, who work hard for our money and need to receive the best value we can when we make purchases. We rely not on the honeyed words of celebrities, but the honest utterances of folks such as ourselves.
I respectfully request an apology, and a change in your marketing style.
Sincerely,
Molly Bishop
(as typed by Halle Berry)