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Articles by
Brian Beatty
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July 13, 2009One-Size-Fits-All Hairnets Are a Lie Perpetuated by the Hairnet Industry
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April 3, 2009Jokes by Brian Beatty: Good Night
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April 2, 2009Jokes by Brian Beatty: Got Your Toes
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April 1, 2009Jokes by Brian Beatty: Ironic Pentameter
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March 31, 2009Jokes by Brian Beatty: Doggone It
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March 30, 2009Jokes by Brian Beatty: Patridiotic
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March 9, 2009Jokes by Brian Beatty: Jumbo Brat
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February 17, 2009Jokes by Brian Beatty: 2%
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January 28, 2009Jokes by Brian Beatty: Wack-Ed Flow
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January 12, 2009Jokes by Brian Beatty: Loverboys
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December 23, 2008Jokes by Brian Beatty: Unhappy Holidays
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November 27, 2008Jokes by Brian Beatty: Thankful
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February 10, 2025Voting for the Mayor Who Promised to Blow Up the City Doesn’t Mean I Approve of the Mayor Blowing Up the City
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February 13, 2025Finally, My Tax Dollars Are Being Used to Uncover Publicly Available Government Information
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February 21, 2025Don’t Tread on Me—Unless You’re a Billionaire with a Ketamine Addiction, in Which Case I Enthusiastically Support It
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February 11, 2025I Vow to Fight Autocracy with Unprecedented Levels of Finger Wagging
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February 25, 2025We’ve Replaced the Government’s Hiring Criteria with a Better, Fairer System: Hiring Whoever Yells the Loudest
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February 25, 2025I’m a Typo, and in This Age of AI, I’m the Real Hero
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February 25, 2025Let’s Bring Back Traditional Values (No, Not Those Ones)
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February 24, 2025Starfleet Eliminating All Diversity, Equity, and Inclusion Programs