ILLUSTORIA MAGAZINE
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Articles by
Dan Rozier
Dan Rozier is a writer living and working in Brooklyn, New York.
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November 8, 2016Hi! Tomorrow I’ll Either Be Working From Home or Selecting My Coffin
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September 28, 2016The Ways People on Dateline “Had it All” According to the Family Cat
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June 16, 2014I Feel Like I’m the Only One Who’s Trying to Get This Narcissist Support Group Off the Ground
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January 27, 2014Nuclear Power Plant Idioms
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November 22, 2013Popular Guilt Trip Destinations
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October 28, 2013Would You Like to Join My Start-Down?
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January 9, 2013Now That’s What I Call Small Talk, Volume 452,793!
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October 15, 2024I’m an Undecided Hobbit, Torn Between a Dark Lord Who Promises an Age of Chaos and an Elf Queen Whom I Just Wish I Knew More About
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September 20, 2024It’s Decorative Gourd Season, Motherfuckers
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August 19, 2024Lest We Forget the Horrors: A Catalog of Trump’s Worst Cruelties, Collusions, Corruptions, and Crimes: The Complete Listing: Atrocities 1–1,056
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October 28, 2024The Starfleet Gazette Will Not Be Endorsing a Candidate for President of the United Federation of Planets
Recently
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November 1, 2024I Will Be Away from My Desk on November 6
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November 1, 2024270 Reasons: Because on January 6, I Was More Afraid Working at the Capitol Than During My Entire Army Deployment to Iraq
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November 1, 2024Template for Donald Trump’s “I Don’t Accept the Election Results” Speeches
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October 31, 2024This Election Wouldn’t Be So Close If My Historically Unpopular Opponent Wasn’t Such a Shrewd Campaigner