ILLUSTORIA MAGAZINE
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Articles by
Joe Wellman
Joe is a writer living in Chicago. He likes riding his bike, listening to music, and making short lists of things he likes to do. Find out more here.
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November 8, 2024At Least Us Democrats Went Down Fighting Harder Than We Normally Do
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July 15, 2024I Can’t Believe Such a Hateful, Violent Act Could Happen in the Hateful, Violent Era I’ve Created
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July 8, 2024Relax, the Only People Panicking About Biden Are Political Insiders, the Media, and Literally Everyone Else
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March 22, 2024TikTok Is a Threat to Our Extremely Normal Media Ecosystem
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January 10, 2024Shit, Looks Like Our Product Very Literally “Revolutionized the Industry”
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December 27, 2023I’m ChatGPT, and for the Love of God, Please Don’t Make Me Do Any More Copywriting
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October 12, 2023For My Next Death-Defying Stunt, I Will Walk Across This Crosswalk
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August 7, 2023There’s Nothing Like Getting Cozy in Your Favorite Chair and Opening a New Goodreads Tab
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April 27, 2023Help Us Remove Spam Facebook Accounts, So You Can Get Flooded With Bullshit from Real Facebook Accounts
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August 4, 2022For My Next Death-Defying Stunt, I Will Ride My Bike in This Bike Lane
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October 2, 2020I’m You In An Alternative 2020 and Even Though There’s No Pandemic, You’re Still Depressed, Plus There’s This Huge Komodo Dragon Problem
Trending 🔥
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November 1, 2024I Will Be Away from My Desk on November 6
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November 6, 2024I Don’t Hate Women Candidates. I Just Thought an Erratic and Vindictive Criminal Was Worthier of My Vote Than a Woman Candidate
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October 28, 2024The Starfleet Gazette Will Not Be Endorsing a Candidate for President of the United Federation of Planets
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August 19, 2024Lest We Forget the Horrors: A Catalog of Trump’s Worst Cruelties, Collusions, Corruptions, and Crimes: The Complete Listing: Atrocities 1–1,056
Recently
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November 8, 2024Finally, the Elites Have Been Defeated by the Billionaires
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November 8, 2024Short Conversations with Poets: Kwame Dawes
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November 8, 2024At Least Us Democrats Went Down Fighting Harder Than We Normally Do
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November 7, 2024Rape Allegations Really Do Ruin Men’s Lives, Because Now a Rapist Is Stuck Running This Country