McSWEENEY'S INTERNET TENDENCY'S PATREON

Join our Patreon at $10/month (or more) and receive a coupon for a discount on the Decorative Gourd Beanie, Gourd mugs, and our glorious new Advent Calendar. Help support our writers and keep our site ad-free.

Articles by

Oneita Jackson

Detroit satirist and author of “Nappy-Headed Negro Syndrome” and “Letters from Mrs. Grundy.”

July 9, 2020

An Influencer Wearing an “All Platforms Matter” T-shirt Steadies Her iPhone For a Facebook message to her 3.4M Followers

by Oneita Jackson
June 10, 2020

A Statement About Black Lives Matter from the International Toothpick Company

by Oneita Jackson

Trending 🔥

October 15, 2024

I’m an Undecided Hobbit, Torn Between a Dark Lord Who Promises an Age of Chaos and an Elf Queen Whom I Just Wish I Knew More About

by Sam Woods
October 28, 2024

The Starfleet Gazette Will Not Be Endorsing a Candidate for President of the United Federation of Planets

by Katryn Bury
September 20, 2024

It’s Decorative Gourd Season, Motherfuckers

by Colin Nissan
August 19, 2024

Lest We Forget the Horrors: A Catalog of Trump’s Worst Cruelties, Collusions, Corruptions, and Crimes: The Complete Listing: Atrocities 1–1,056

by Ben Parker, Stephanie Steinbrecher, Kelsey Ronan, John McMurtrie, Sophia DuRose, Rachel Villa, and Amy Sumerton

Recently

November 4, 2024

270 Reasons: Because There Are No Rights, No Freedoms That Some Extremists Won’t Try to Take From Us

by Christian F. Nunes
November 4, 2024

Eeyore’s Tips for Election Day Self-Care

by Jennie Egerdie
November 3, 2024

Based on Our Election Forecast, We Are 100 Percent Sure Anything Could Fucking Happen

by Tom Ellison
November 1, 2024

I Will Be Away from My Desk on November 6

by Lauren Thoman