ILLUSTORIA MAGAZINE
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Articles by
Sarah Garb
Sarah Garb lives with her husband and their two children in California, where she never attempts the Godforsaken Gauntlet of Temptation during a full moon.
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June 27, 2024Mantras for the Eight-Year-Old Boy Who Is About to Walk into Target
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June 7, 2022Style Questionnaire for “It’s on Backwards”: The Clothing Subscription Box for Preschoolers
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December 13, 2021We Feel You Have Not Been Sufficiently Notified of Our School’s Early Dismissal on Friday
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June 1, 2018Yes, Your Toddler Is Gaslighting You
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November 17, 2011Crate and Barrel Furniture or Character from The Wire?
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February 3, 2011Ingredients in Tostitos Hint of Lime Chips
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October 15, 2009Lowest Priority H1N1 Vaccine Groups
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August 5, 2005Lesser-Known Movie Prequels
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August 20, 2003McSweeney’s Brain Exploder: Revenge of the Hunt and Peckers
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September 16, 2002Actual and Made-up Adages Used to Promote the Consumption of Pork
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June 3, 2002Signatures Available from Print Shop’s Certificate Maker Program
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October 15, 2024I’m an Undecided Hobbit, Torn Between a Dark Lord Who Promises an Age of Chaos and an Elf Queen Whom I Just Wish I Knew More About
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October 28, 2024The Starfleet Gazette Will Not Be Endorsing a Candidate for President of the United Federation of Planets
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September 20, 2024It’s Decorative Gourd Season, Motherfuckers
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August 19, 2024Lest We Forget the Horrors: A Catalog of Trump’s Worst Cruelties, Collusions, Corruptions, and Crimes: The Complete Listing: Atrocities 1–1,056
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November 4, 2024Eeyore’s Tips for Election Day Self-Care
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