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Articles by
Spencer Hyde
Spencer Hyde left Russia for the United States where he studied Bolshevik-Leninist theory at the University of California, Pennsylvania. After his studies at UCalPenn, he went on to work for a Swedenborgian Hosier where he met the descendants of T.S Eliot. There, he began writing his first Post-Truth Treatise on how to eat Gluten Free while still respecting Indigenous cultures. He recently rejected an offer to sing a capella at Trump’s inauguration. If he could go back in time and witness any historical event, it would be the first Civil War reenactment. He has been published places.
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December 14, 2022When “They Died Doing What They Loved” Was Unfortunately True
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February 9, 2021Utilitarian Expository Comments Added to Films So Your Overly Analytical Father-in-Law Will Shut the Hell Up While the Movie’s Playing
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November 19, 2018A Parent’s Guide to Your Teenager’s Linguistic Distillation of Classic AP Lit Titles
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February 20, 2017The Teachers Guide to Famous Poetry Plagiarized by Undergrads Using Word’s Right-Click Synonym Finder
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March 22, 2012An All-American Percussionist’s Post-NCAA Tournament Game Recap
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March 18, 2025Senator Schumer Votes to Let the Big Wooden Horse into Troy
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March 24, 2025Lest We Forget the Horrors: An Unending Catalog of Trump’s Cruelties, Collusions, Corruptions, and Crimes
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March 10, 2025As an American Jew, I Feel Completely Reassured for My Safety Now That Trump Has Targeted the Epicenter of American Antisemitism, Columbia University
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March 13, 2025It’s a Shame We Have to Betray Our Allies, Starve the Poor, Halt Scientific Progress, Destroy the Environment, and Eliminate the Freedoms Enshrined in the Bill of Rights, but at Least My Investment Portfolio Is Also Tanking
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March 28, 2025Although I Voted for You to Be Turned into Soup, There’s No Reason We Can’t Be Friends Before You Are Liquefied
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March 28, 2025Brutally Honest Emails from Academia.edu
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March 27, 2025We Are the People Who Buy Red Delicious Apples
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March 27, 2025A Letter from Believer Editor Daniel Gumbiner