The Believer Magazine
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We’re Committed to Brokering Peace in Ukraine; Also We’re Invading Greenland
“Just think of how much better off the people of Greenland will be once they’re Americans, and are therefore no longer saddled with ‘Nanny State’ programs like paid family leave, free healthcare, or access to reproductive care.” -
Lists
Increasingly Inconvenient MTA Service Advisories
“Service has been disrupted due to a power outage at Fifty-Ninth Street–Columbus Circle because I had to unplug the third rail to charge my phone.” -
I’m a German Citizen in 1933, and Is It Just Me or Is It Really Hard to Get Any Work Done Right Now?
“Surely, we have emergency brakes to stop these kinds of things. Someone will intervene. I would look into who that is supposed to be exactly, but this glockenspiel isn’t going to tune itself.” -
Open Letters to People or Entities Who Are Unlikely to RespondAn Open Letter to ICE Regarding My Potential Disappearance“Are you deporting only these legal residents with ties to college campuses, or do you plan on expanding to other places, like cultural centers or the Halal Guys?”
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We Will No Longer Waste Taxpayer Money on Anything, Since Nothing Is Real
“We in the federal government have recently unearthed a scandal of epic proportions: During the previous administration, trillions of taxpayer dollars were wasted on ‘programs’ intended to ‘help’ ‘people.’”
Trending
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March 24, 2025Lest We Forget the Horrors: An Unending Catalog of Trump’s Cruelties, Collusions, Corruptions, and Crimes
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March 18, 2025Senator Schumer Votes to Let the Big Wooden Horse into Troy
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March 26, 2025Excerpts from a Red-Hot Right-Wing Romance Novel
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March 25, 2025The Plan to Bomb the Middle East Finally Made It Out of the Group Chat
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March 21, 2025American History Lessons Edited to Comply with Anti-DEI Standards
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March 28, 2025Although I Voted for You to Be Turned into Soup, There’s No Reason We Can’t Be Friends Before You Are Liquefied
Interviews, Essays, and Excerpts
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March 27, 2025A Letter from Believer Editor Daniel Gumbiner
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March 24, 2025Lest We Forget the Horrors: An Unending Catalog of Trump’s Cruelties, Collusions, Corruptions, and Crimes
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March 21, 2025Excerpts from The Believer: The Process: Judy Baca, Generation on Fire, 2023
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March 14, 2025Excerpts from The Believer: An Interview with Michael Smith
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March 7, 2025Excerpts from The Believer: Stuff I’ve Been Reading: Winter 2024
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March 5, 2025Short Conversations with Poets: Dong Li
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February 28, 2025Excerpts from The Believer: Resurrector: Black Square
News & Announcements
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Our friends at Voice of Witness have an excellent lineup of guest speakers who will share insights from their oral history work. Click for more info.
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NEW YORK: Join us April 23rd to celebrate Jason Roeder being a finalist for this year’s Thurber Prize for American Humor Writing. Click for details.
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Dave Eggers will be touring the northeast in early April in support of his Newbery Medal-winning book, The Eyes & the Impossible. Click for details.
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Behold the heroes on our Patreon Donor Wall of Fame
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Visit DAVEEGGERS.NET
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Recent Posts
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March 31, 2025I’m a Free-Thinking Centrist with Only Right-Wing Ideas
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March 31, 2025Son, I Forbid You to Join That Rowdy, No-Good Zorba the Greek Fan Club
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March 28, 2025Although I Voted for You to Be Turned into Soup, There’s No Reason We Can’t Be Friends Before You Are Liquefied
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March 28, 2025Brutally Honest Emails from Academia.edu
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March 27, 2025We Are the People Who Buy Red Delicious Apples
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