Toured the @usembassynassau, now headed off to #FyreFestival. gourmet food. Treasure hunts. Pablo Escobar’s old digs. What’s not to love?
— @conchman2 [12:14 PM — 27 Apr]

Bouncing from the @usembassynassau reception to #FyreFestival. Blessed to sing backup for @blink182 and @Migos w my #Choir #squad!
— @SingingJackMerridew [2:27 PM — 27 Apr]

@SingingJackMerridew @usembassynassau @blink182 @Migos OH NO WHAT THE FUCKKKK!?!?!
— @SingingJackMerridew [9:32 PM — 27 Apr]

I dropped 12K to stay in a parking lot with no beer, medical staff, or toilets… @usembassynassau @KendallJenner @FBI
— @Piggy1989 [9:45 PM — 27 Apr]

@Piggy1989 @usembassynassau @KendallJenner @FBI My auntie is going to kill me
— @Piggy1989 [9:46 PM — 27 Apr]

insane situation at #fyrefestival, @usembassynassau. looks like i’m the only one w laptop rn — everyone else left theirs in the tents
— @conchman2 [11:09 PM — 27 Apr]

@conchman2 @usembassynassau if anyone needs a hug at #fyrefestival, i’m by the treeline picking some fruits for the littluns
— @simonbrighteyes [11:13 PM — 27 Apr]

hey @usembassynassau — direct everyone at #fyrefestival to the concierge desk. i’m organizing a group here. #sticktogether
— @conchman2 [11:35 PM — 27 Apr]

@conchman2 @usembassynassau i’m sorry, did Ja Rule die and leave you in charge?
— @SingingJackMerridew [11:37 PM — 27 Apr]

@usembassynassau @conchman2 I mean how does having a working laptop = leadership? I’m technically a #FyreFestival performer. I can sing C ♯
— @SingingJackMerridew [11:43 PM — 27 Apr]

SOS @usembassynassau! Instagram models came into my tent + took my bed, passport, and inhaler. i have asthma. what do I do?
— @Piggy1989 [12:06 AM — 28 Apr]

@Piggy1989 @usembassynassau come to the concierge desk. we just need to hang tight and work together till help gets here.
— @conchman2 [12:10 PM — 28 Apr]

send help to #fyrefestival stat, @usembassynassau. tents on fire. wild dogs attacking. some guy in a feather headdress just fainted. chaos
— @conchman2 [1:05 AM — 28 Apr]

stuck on a FUCKING gravel pit w a fattie, a fainting hippie, and a guy wearing a conch necklace telling us what to do. HELP, @usembassynassau
— @SingingJackMerridew [2:37 AM — 28 Apr]

Hey, @usembassynassau! I’m the guy who fainted earlier. Don’t worry about me. :) Enjoying a stroll thru the jungle on this misty morning
— @simonbrighteyes [8:43 AM — 28 Apr]

TFW people start calling you by your twitter handle in real life. WTF. #MyNameIsNotPiggy @usembassynassau
— @Piggy1989 [8:58 AM — 28 Apr]

@Piggy1989 @usembassynassau i feel bad for starting that, man, but you don’t have to subtweet me
— @conchman2 [9:00 AM — 28 Apr]

lots of bees here. Bees ‘n twisting, tangled creepers ‘n choice fruit. @usembassynassau
— @simonbrighteyes [9:34 AM — 28 Apr]

trying to collect a list of names of attendees so @usembassynassau can contact families, but everyone’s fucking around
— @conchman2 [10:50 AM — 28 Apr]

swear to god, @usembassynassau, i heard people whispering that tyga + pusha t were still coming. People are losing their minds on this beach
— @conchman2 [11:53 AM — 28 Apr]

just wanted to mention something, @usembassynassau… in case anything happens to me at #FyreFestival. So we took attendance… 1/4
— @Piggy1989 [12:58 PM — 28 Apr]

@usembassynassau… and like obviously no one is having a good time here today… there’s no beer and nothing to eat… 2/4
— @Piggy1989 [12:59 PM — 28 Apr]

@usembassynassau so when people are snippy, I definitely understand 3/4
— @Piggy1989 [1:02 PM — 28 Apr]

@usembassynassau but I think one of @blink182’s backup vocalists wants to kill me 4/4
— @Piggy1989 [1:04 PM — 28 Apr]

since the @usembassynassau clearly isn’t listening — please help us, @SandalsResorts. We r stranded + some folks are getting pretty furious
— @conchman2 [2:07 PM — 28 Apr]

We’re gonna to keep watch on the folks at @SandalsResorts (since @usembassynassau is no help). Maybe a guest there can help us
— @conchman2 [2:47 PM — 28 Apr]

They promised Michelin star chefs, @usembassynassau. We got wonder bread + lukewarm cheese slices. We’ll need to hunt for our own food now.
— @SingingJackMerridew [2:51 PM — 28 Apr]

@SingingJackMerridew and his choir are now on watch duty re: @SandalsResorts. @usembassynassau
— @conchman2 [3:05 PM — 28 Apr]

Meanwhile, @Piggy1989, @simonbrighteyes, + I are seeing if we can trek thru the jungle + get back to the airport. @usembassynassau
— @conchman2 [3:07 PM — 28 Apr]

got to the airport, but it was useless. flights delayed beyond belief. conditions just as squalid as the eco-domes. @usembassynassau
— @conchman2 [5:55 PM — 28 Apr]

back 2 the beach in time to see @SandalsResorts yachts sail by. missed them. @SingingJackMerridew + crew nowhere in sight. @usembassynassau
— @conchman2 [6:03 PM — 28 Apr]

singing backup vocals for freaking mygos or whatever doesn’t mean you can do whatever you want. @usembassynassau
— @conchman2 [6:04 PM — 28 Apr]

TIME TO HUNT. Kill the pig. Kill. Cut. Blood. @usembassynassau
— @SingingJackMerridew [6:13 PM — 28 Apr]

we couldn’t find any pigs, but we did find some more sandwiches in the unfinished restaurant pavilion. @usembassynassau
— @SingingJackMerridew [7:00 PM — 28 Apr]

And some salad, with no salad dressing. I honestly want to murder everyone. @usembassynassau
— @SingingJackMerridew [7:02 PM — 28 Apr]

Bad day. PHONE @ 45%! Rumble with @blink182’s backup singers over some salad. Smashed my glasses. Can barely see. @usembassynassau
— @Piggy1989 [8:15 PM — 28 Apr]

I think I’d like to take another walk in the moonlight. Too many bad vibes on the beach. @usembassynassau
— @simonbrighteyes [9:45 PM — 28 Apr]

So this @SingingJackMerridew has really turned into a homicidal maniac… @usembassynassau
— @conchman2 [10:02 PM — 28 Apr]

@conchman2 @usembassynassau I SAW JA RULE IN THE FOREST. I SAW THE BEAST. TONIGHT, WE HUNT.
— @SingingJackMerridew [11:07 PM — 28 Apr]

I see now that this was truly the wrong time to take molly @usembassynassau
— @simonbrighteyes [12:10 AM — 29 Apr]

@simonbrighteyes @usembassynassau at least the hunting party’s up ahead. i’ll run over to them.
— @simonbrighteyes [12:12 AM — 29 Apr]

@simonbrighteyes @usembassynassau and it’s a beautiful night. i can see the jellyfish glowing in the dark water.
— @simonbrighteyes [12:13 AM — 29 Apr]

@usembassynassau KILL THE BEAST. KILL. CUT. BLOOD.
— @SingingJackMerridew [12:14 AM — 29 Apr]

SOS @usembassynassau. they killed @simonbrighteyes. @Piggy1989 and I tried to run for the airport, but the doors are chained shut
— @conchman2 [7:02 AM — 29 Apr]

@SingingJackMerridew and his posse are hunting us now. there’s no talking them down. @usembassynassau
— @conchman2 [7:03 AM — 29 Apr]

they’re coming. the hunters. i can hear their cries in the jungle. @usembassynassau
— @conchman2 [8:34 AM — 29 Apr]

@SingingJackMerridew Poll: Which is better, @SandalsResorts, @usembassynassau, and rescue, or hunting and breaking things up?
— @Piggy1989 [8:56 AM — 29 Apr]

they just killed @Piggy1989. holy fuck. they smashed him off a cliff w an abandoned speaker. @usembassynassau
— @conchman2 [9:40 AM — 29 Apr]

my Mac got smashed too. Tweeting this from my dying phone — only 6% left @usembassynassau
— @conchman2 [9:41 AM — 29 Apr]

They’re all running toward me. i can’t get away @usembassynassau
— @conchman2 [9:49 AM — 29 Apr]

@conchman2 @usembassynassau KILLLLLLL
— @SingingJackMerridew [10:50 AM — 29 Apr]

@SingingJackMerridew @usembassynassau oh my god
— @conchman2 [10:51 AM — 29 Apr]

Looks like @usembassynassau has finally got here. i’m safe.
— @conchman2 [10:52 AM — 29 Apr]

@conchman2 @usembassynassau before my phone dies — my friend @Piggy1989 was true and he was wise. He was just here for Major Lazer
— @conchman2 [10:53 AM — 29 Apr]

@conchman2 @usembassynassau I can still see him falling. #RIP
— @conchman2 [10:55 AM — 29 Apr]

We’d have thought that a bunch of Instagram models and trust fund kids would have been able to put up a better show, @conchman2
— @usembassynassau [10:53 AM — 29 Apr]

@usembassynassau don’t @ me rn
— @conchman2 [10:54 AM — 29 Apr]