When Harry Met Sally…

“I came here tonight because when you realize you want to ruin the future for everybody, you want the future to start as soon as possible.”

Notting Hill

“Don’t forget—I’m also just an unelected tech billionaire, standing in front of a Treasury Department, asking it to give him sensitive taxpayer data.”

Love Story

“Filling the Supreme Court with conservative justices means never having to say you’re sorry.”

Casablanca

“We’ll always have pulling out of the Paris Agreement.”

Love Actually

“It seems to me that migrants are everywhere. Often, they’re not particularly dignified or newsworthy, but they’re always there. If you look for them, I’ve got a sneaky feeling you’ll find some of them, actually, being flown to Guantanamo.”

Titanic

“You jump, I jump out of the UN Human Rights Council.”

My Best Friend’s Wedding

“If you hate someone, you ban them from competing in women’s sports. You ban them right then, in Sharpie. Otherwise, the first month in office just… passes you by.”

Dirty Dancing

“I’m scared of walking out of this room and never feeling the rest of my whole life the way I feel when I’m imposing tariffs on our biggest trade partners.”

Bridget Jones’s Diary

“What I’m trying to say, very inarticulately, is that, um, in fact, perhaps despite appearances, I like old white men being in charge of everything very much. Just as they are.”

As Good as It Gets

“You make me want to be a better efficiency tsar.”

The Notebook

“It’s not gonna be easy. It’s gonna be really hard. We’re gonna have to work at this every day, but I want to do that because I want you, Gaza, and I want you too, Canada, Greenland, and Panama Canal. I want all of you. Forever. You and me… every day.”

Pretty Woman

“So, what happened after the patriot climbed up the Capitol wall and rescued the president’s legacy?”

“He rescues him right back. You’re pardoned.”

Annie Hall

“I thought of that old joke, y’know, the, this… this guy goes to a psychiatrist and says, ‘Doc, uh, my brother’s crazy; he thinks he’s a chicken.’ And the doctor says, ‘Well, why don’t you turn him in?’ The guy says, ‘I would, but I need the eggs.’ Well, I guess that’s pretty much now how I feel about consumerism and inflated costs; y’know, they’re totally irrational and crazy and absurd and… but, uh, I guess, we keep buying because, uh, most of us… need the eggs.”

Sense and Sensibility

“I’ve come here with no expectations, only to profess, now that I am at liberty to do so, that your democratic rights are, and always will be, mine.”

Four Weddings and a Funeral

“There I was, standing there in the Oval Office, and for the first time in my whole life, I realized I totally and utterly listened to one person. And it wasn’t my advisors or anyone in Congress. It’s the person standing opposite me now… in the OCCUPY MARS belly shirt.”

“Am I still wearing that top?… I hadn’t noticed.”

Jerry Maguire

“You complete my anti-DEI bills.”

“Shut up! Just shut up. You had me at ‘Minorities cause aviation accidents.’”