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Articles by
Chris Keilman
Chris is a copywriter and fiction writer based in San Francisco.
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December 19, 2022Now That I’ve Quit Twitter, I Have So Much More Time to Cook This Pot Roast
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February 3, 2021Fuck Off, Dad! We’re Eating Apple Jacks
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April 27, 2018I Am a Motivated Self-Starter and a Dolphin Warrior On a Quest
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October 20, 2017Artisanal Coffee Flavor Profiles Brought to You By Metallica
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March 24, 2025Lest We Forget the Horrors: An Unending Catalog of Trump’s Cruelties, Collusions, Corruptions, and Crimes
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March 18, 2025Senator Schumer Votes to Let the Big Wooden Horse into Troy
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March 26, 2025Excerpts from a Red-Hot Right-Wing Romance Novel
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March 25, 2025The Plan to Bomb the Middle East Finally Made It Out of the Group Chat
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March 31, 2025I’m a Free-Thinking Centrist with Only Right-Wing Ideas
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March 31, 2025Son, I Forbid You to Join That Rowdy, No-Good Zorba the Greek Fan Club
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March 28, 2025Although I Voted for You to Be Turned into Soup, There’s No Reason We Can’t Be Friends Before You Are Liquefied
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March 28, 2025Brutally Honest Emails from Academia.edu