McSWEENEY'S INTERNET TENDENCY'S PATREON
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Articles by
Jake Tapper
Jake Tapper is Chief Washington Correspondent for CNN and host of the news programs The Lead with Jake Tapper and State of the Union.
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December 1, 2017I Am the Melted Skull of Nazi Major Arnold Toht, the Ruthless Gestapo Agent With the Burned Hand In Raiders of the Lost Ark, and I Appreciate Your Sudden Interest In My Thoughts and Feelings
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May 22, 2017Why Does the Lame-Stream Media Only Focus On the Negative Regarding John Wilkes Booth?
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January 6, 1999Though I Can’t Be Certain, I Suspect That This Hollywood Actress I’m Interviewing May Be Entertaining Thoughts of Having Sex With Me
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March 24, 2025Lest We Forget the Horrors: An Unending Catalog of Trump’s Cruelties, Collusions, Corruptions, and Crimes
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March 18, 2025Senator Schumer Votes to Let the Big Wooden Horse into Troy
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March 26, 2025Excerpts from a Red-Hot Right-Wing Romance Novel
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March 25, 2025The Plan to Bomb the Middle East Finally Made It Out of the Group Chat
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April 1, 2025I’m a German Citizen in 1933, and Is It Just Me or Is It Really Hard to Get Any Work Done Right Now?
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April 1, 2025An Open Letter to ICE Regarding My Potential Disappearance
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March 31, 2025We Will No Longer Waste Taxpayer Money on Anything, Since Nothing Is Real
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March 31, 2025I’m a Free-Thinking Centrist with Only Right-Wing Ideas