ILLUSTORIA MAGAZINE
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Articles by
Janelle Blasdel
Janelle Blasdel is an improviser, writer, and advertising creative in Chicago.
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August 4, 2022The Time Traveler’s Wife Is Late… AGAIN
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April 9, 2021For Your Return to the Office, We’ve Added Three Rooms for Guttural Screaming
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March 20, 2019How to Take a Compliment in the Midwest
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September 14, 2016Tinder is the Night (And the Day And the Morning And the Bathroom)
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May 5, 2016I’m Not Sure How to Weigh In On This, But I’m Going to Weigh In On This
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April 23, 2015Take Your Child’s Meds and Go to Work Day
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June 23, 2014A Bear Explains How to Survive a Bear Attack
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October 15, 2024I’m an Undecided Hobbit, Torn Between a Dark Lord Who Promises an Age of Chaos and an Elf Queen Whom I Just Wish I Knew More About
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September 20, 2024It’s Decorative Gourd Season, Motherfuckers
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August 19, 2024Lest We Forget the Horrors: A Catalog of Trump’s Worst Cruelties, Collusions, Corruptions, and Crimes: The Complete Listing: Atrocities 1–1,056
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October 28, 2024The Starfleet Gazette Will Not Be Endorsing a Candidate for President of the United Federation of Planets
Recently
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November 1, 2024I Will Be Away from My Desk on November 6
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November 1, 2024270 Reasons: Because on January 6, I Was More Afraid Working at the Capitol Than During My Entire Army Deployment to Iraq
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November 1, 2024Template for Donald Trump’s “I Don’t Accept the Election Results” Speeches
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October 31, 2024This Election Wouldn’t Be So Close If My Historically Unpopular Opponent Wasn’t Such a Shrewd Campaigner