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Articles by
John Long
John Long is a creative director who lives in New York.
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October 26, 2021To Win in 2022, Republicans Must Fight Cancel Culture and Fire Anyone Who Teaches Critical Race Theory
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July 15, 2019It’s Time for Us Republicans to Reject Trump’s Blatant Bigotry and Return to Good Old Fashioned Dog-Whistle Race-Baiting
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May 23, 2019The Thing I Need Most In My Life Right Now Is a Purpose-Driven Paper Towel Brand
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July 6, 2018I Was Going to Vote Democrat This November Until All This Incivility Forced Me Back on the Trump Train
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September 18, 2017Don’t Shame Me for Not Vaccinating My Labradoodle
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May 19, 2017Trump Voters Are Still Cautiously Optimistic
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April 11, 201710 Terms to Be Used by United Airlines Personnel When Addressing the Public
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March 24, 2025Lest We Forget the Horrors: An Unending Catalog of Trump’s Cruelties, Collusions, Corruptions, and Crimes
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March 18, 2025Senator Schumer Votes to Let the Big Wooden Horse into Troy
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January 15, 2025Signs You Are a Gen-Xer Who’s About to Turn Sixty
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March 25, 2025The Plan to Bomb the Middle East Finally Made It Out of the Group Chat
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March 28, 2025Although I Voted for You to Be Turned into Soup, There’s No Reason We Can’t Be Friends Before You Are Liquefied
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March 28, 2025Brutally Honest Emails from Academia.edu
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March 27, 2025We Are the People Who Buy Red Delicious Apples
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March 27, 2025A Letter from Believer Editor Daniel Gumbiner