ILLUSTORIA MAGAZINE
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Articles by
Jonathan Zeller
Jonathan Zeller is a writer, editor, and comedian who’s contributed to National Lampoon, the New York Times, and Teen Vogue.
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September 24, 2024Book Review: The Great Gatsby by the Xerox 914 Photocopier
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June 26, 2024Calm Down—Your Phone Isn’t Listening to Your Conversations. It’s Just Tracking Everything You Type, Every App You Use, Every Website You Visit, and Everywhere You Go in the Physical World
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December 29, 2023Introducing Total Crap, the First Magazine Written Entirely by AI
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November 3, 2023The All-Time Best Moments from America’s Got Lettuce
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September 10, 2021Ted Lasso Is a Shining Example of Kindness and Decency, and Critics Who Disagree Should Burn in Hell Forever
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May 27, 2021An Oral History of the Interstitial Ska Music on Friends
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October 17, 2019My Biggest Regrets About Retiring at 24
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December 18, 2018You Had Mail
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August 15, 2018How to Handle Anxiety About the Toxic Sludge Filling Your Bedroom
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June 19, 2018Eleven Things You Definitely Don’t Know About Nirvana, You Idiot
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April 3, 2018Updated Sinclair Broadcast Group Anchor Script
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January 25, 2018Quiz: Janet’s Father Has Died. Can You Make This About You?
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October 15, 2024I’m an Undecided Hobbit, Torn Between a Dark Lord Who Promises an Age of Chaos and an Elf Queen Whom I Just Wish I Knew More About
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October 28, 2024The Starfleet Gazette Will Not Be Endorsing a Candidate for President of the United Federation of Planets
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September 20, 2024It’s Decorative Gourd Season, Motherfuckers
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August 19, 2024Lest We Forget the Horrors: A Catalog of Trump’s Worst Cruelties, Collusions, Corruptions, and Crimes: The Complete Listing: Atrocities 1–1,056
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November 4, 2024Don’t Worry—This Is Exactly How the Founding Fathers Intended You to Feel on Election Day
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November 4, 2024270 Reasons: Because There Are No Rights, No Freedoms That Some Extremists Won’t Try to Take From Us
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November 4, 2024Eeyore’s Tips for Election Day Self-Care
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November 3, 2024Based on Our Election Forecast, We Are 100 Percent Sure Anything Could Fucking Happen