McSWEENEY'S INTERNET TENDENCY'S PATREON
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Articles by
Sam Shelstad
Sam Shelstad lives in Toronto, Ontario. His first book of short stories, Cop House, was released this fall by Nightwood Editions.
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December 21, 2017This Year’s Top-Selling Book is an Accent Pillow
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July 18, 2017A Few Questions Before We Decide to Let You Join Our Running Club
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December 14, 2015Trampolines Were Supposed to Bring Us Closer Together, But I Think They’re Driving Us Further Apart
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July 6, 2015Pool Rules
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February 27, 2015Sentient Cloud of Poisonous Gas Seeks Companion
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July 2, 2014Minutes from a Town Hall Meeting of My Anxieties
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August 28, 2013This Deer Won’t Look Both Ways
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January 17, 2013The Right Time
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January 15, 2025A Marriage Proposal Spoken Entirely in Office Jargon
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January 8, 2025Did You Even Consider Every Possible Lived Experience Before Recklessly Posting Your Chili Recipe on Social Media?
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January 9, 2025I Will Pay Any Amount to Not Pay My Taxes
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January 15, 2025Signs You Are a Gen-Xer Who’s About to Turn Sixty
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January 20, 2025Welcome Home, President Nyarlathotep
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January 17, 2025Who Said It: Donald Trump or Martin Luther King Jr.?
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January 17, 2025Excerpts from The Believer: An Interview with Annie Leibovitz
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January 17, 2025It’s About Time Our Government Finally Reflects the Real America—An Airport Terminal at 10 a.m. on a Weekday