The Believer Magazine
All posts tagged
cdc
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April 20, 2022There’s No Need to Wear a Mask On This Flight—We’re Not Scared! Now Take Off Your Shoes in Case There’s a Bomb in Your Socks
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February 1, 2022The CDC’s COVID-19 Guidelines for Moms Who Are Just So Tired of This Shit
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January 10, 2022Questions for the CDC in Light of the Omicron Variant from Concerned Parents, for the Love of Christ
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April 30, 2021CDC’s Guidelines for When It’s Safe to Still Wear Lounge Pants
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December 17, 2020A Warning from the CDC for All Hallmark Movie Protagonists Returning to Their Hometowns This Christmas
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March 27, 2020An Open Letter to Dr. Anthony Fauci Asking for Passover Seder Advice
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March 6, 2020“A Solid Flu Vaccine”: A Scientist Looks Back On the Day Trump Came Up With a Cure For the Coronavirus
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February 27, 2020The CDC’s Revised Facial Hairstyles and Filtering Facepiece Respirators Chart
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February 14, 2017The CDC Has Issued a Quarantine Order for All the Lovey-Dovey Crap You See On Valentine’s Day
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January 24, 2017Deregulated CDC Handwashing Guidelines
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March 18, 2025Senator Schumer Votes to Let the Big Wooden Horse into Troy
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March 24, 2025Lest We Forget the Horrors: An Unending Catalog of Trump’s Cruelties, Collusions, Corruptions, and Crimes
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March 10, 2025As an American Jew, I Feel Completely Reassured for My Safety Now That Trump Has Targeted the Epicenter of American Antisemitism, Columbia University
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March 13, 2025It’s a Shame We Have to Betray Our Allies, Starve the Poor, Halt Scientific Progress, Destroy the Environment, and Eliminate the Freedoms Enshrined in the Bill of Rights, but at Least My Investment Portfolio Is Also Tanking
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March 28, 2025Although I Voted for You to Be Turned into Soup, There’s No Reason We Can’t Be Friends Before You Are Liquefied
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March 28, 2025Brutally Honest Emails from Academia.edu
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March 27, 2025We Are the People Who Buy Red Delicious Apples
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March 27, 2025A Letter from Believer Editor Daniel Gumbiner