In light of the recent Omicron wave and the skyrocketing pediatric hospital admissions, we’ve compiled a list of questions from concerned parents. Please submit your questions via the form below.

“If I’m fully vaccinated and boosted, will my newborn receive any immunity to Omicron while breastfeeding, and will she be able to meet her grandparents before she turns five?”
— Jill, new mother

“When I take my kids to the indoor Playspace because it’s twenty degrees outside and there is a sign next to an empty hand sanitizer that says, LEAVE THE GERMS OUTSIDE, but fifty people are gathering indoors without masks, should I laugh or cry?”
— Delante, father of three

“If an unmasked person does not adhere to six feet of distance in the supermarket near my unvaccinated children, do I unleash the diatribe of vitriol I’ve been lulling myself to sleep with for the past two years for just this occasion or invite them home to spend time alone with my kids for the approximate one million hours that exist between 7:00 a.m. and 7:00 p.m.?”
— Melody, mother of three children under five
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“When I am at the drugstore with my infant and an unmasked patron ridicules me for maintaining distance while fake-coughing in my direction, can I punch her in the face or would that put me at risk for Omicron?”
— Sam, first-time mom

“If my unvaccinated toddler has to attend preschool so I can work to pay for said preschool and to assuage the crippling debt of my never-ending student loans, when will the Equal Rights Amendment be ratified by all fifty states?”
— Joanna, mother of two

“With Omicron being the most contagious variant yet and my baby too young to wear a mask for supermarket trips, should I splurge on Instacart for groceries or begin hunting wild game in my backyard and building a complicated gutter system to capture rainwater?”
— Cal, first-time dad

“If I’m living in a town that will not impose a mask mandate, so we are forced to stay at home quarantined in eighteen-degree weather, is drinking alone still a red flag for alcoholism?”
— Valerie, mother of four

“Since we’ve been quarantining to protect our child for nearly two years while anti-vax, anti-mask contingents populate our playground while wearing pro-life paraphernalia, is there a God and does she believe in chaos theory?”
— Kayla, parent of toddler

“If I keep my unvaccinated children home from school to protect them from the latest COVID surge, who will be more developmentally delayed—the twins because they missed preschool or me because I had to leave my career at forty?”
— Ellen, mother of twins

“Why does God hate me? Is it something I did? Did I have too many sexual thoughts as a teen? Is this because I bent that car’s fender while pulling out of the parking garage and didn’t leave a note on the other car’s windshield?”
— Jo, parent of a one-year-old

“Day after day, I dream of driving my head through a wall and watching the small pieces of plaster and dust gather at my feet while the pain slowly builds in my forehead and spreads behind my eyes. Is this an Omicron thing?”
— Stan, father of four

“As a high-risk pregnancy, I’m concerned about contracting Omicron. With no universal mask or vaccine mandates to protect our most vulnerable population, children, as well as the abrupt end to the child tax credit, and zero support for parents navigating the unassailable reality of raising children during a pandemic while struggling to afford childcare, health care, and groceries, I’m just wondering… will people give a shit about my children once they are born or do people only care about them while they are still in the womb?”
— Julie, expectant mother

Thank you for your questions. We look forward to qualifying and hedging on the softball ones during our Friday briefing at noon.