McSWEENEY'S INTERNET TENDENCY'S PATREON
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All posts tagged
cover-letters
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June 6, 2024An Open Letter to the University Hiring Committee
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July 13, 2023It’s the Job of My Dreams, But I’d Have to Write a Cover Letter, So Never Mind
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January 28, 2020Why Cover Letters Are Such an Important Part of Building a Miniature Town Made of Paper
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June 7, 2018Welcome to The Void, Where 99% of All Job Applications End Up
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April 27, 2018I Am a Motivated Self-Starter and a Dolphin Warrior On a Quest
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September 26, 2017Allow Me to Take the Opportunity Afforded to Me by This Cover Letter to Explain the Four Year Gap in My Employment When I Was Stuck in a Corn Maze
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September 8, 2017I’ve Fit So Many Keywords From This Job Posting Into My Cover Letter, There’s No Way HR Can Pass Me Up This Time
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July 31, 2017Nine Winning Intros to Solve That Boring Cover Letter
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February 20, 2017A Ringling Bros. Elephant Trainer Applies to Hewlett-Packard
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January 10, 2017Please Consider Me for Your Racial Ambassador Position
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October 15, 2024I’m an Undecided Hobbit, Torn Between a Dark Lord Who Promises an Age of Chaos and an Elf Queen Whom I Just Wish I Knew More About
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September 20, 2024It’s Decorative Gourd Season, Motherfuckers
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August 19, 2024Lest We Forget the Horrors: A Catalog of Trump’s Worst Cruelties, Collusions, Corruptions, and Crimes: The Complete Listing: Atrocities 1–1,056
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October 28, 2024The Starfleet Gazette Will Not Be Endorsing a Candidate for President of the United Federation of Planets
Recently
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November 1, 2024I Will Be Away from My Desk on November 6
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November 1, 2024270 Reasons: Because on January 6, I Was More Afraid Working at the Capitol Than During My Entire Army Deployment to Iraq
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November 1, 2024Template for Donald Trump’s “I Don’t Accept the Election Results” Speeches
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October 31, 2024This Election Wouldn’t Be So Close If My Historically Unpopular Opponent Wasn’t Such a Shrewd Campaigner