Fly me to the moon
But please book on Spirit Airlines
Because that’s all I can afford between my three part-time jobs
Birds do it
Bees do it
Even educated fleas do it
Let’s do it
Let’s enter into a non-monogamous hetero-centric throuple with your friend Ingrid from hot yoga
There’s a somebody I’m longing to see
I hope that he
turns out to be
Someone who went to school for coding or whatever
So at least one of us will have job security
In the wee small hours of the morning
While the whole wide world is fast asleep
I lie awake and think about what color my uniform will be
When I’m drafted into the Great Water Wars that will tear apart families, and decimate nations
Someday when I’m awfully low
When the world is cold
I will feel a glow just thinking of you
And also of that time I had a tweet go viral
Mostly of you
50/50 I guess
‘S wonderful
‘S marvelous
Sorry, I’m slurring my words
I got a concussion and I don’t have health insurance
Is your figure less than Greek?
Is your mouth a little weak?
When you open it to speak
Are you smart?
Why, yes I am an incel
Why do you ask?
Bitch.
I get no kick from Champagne
Mere alcohol doesn’t move me at all
I only do Molly at festivals now
And sometimes just on Tuesdays
My pupils aren’t dilated they’re just like that I swear
It’s that old devil moon
That you stole from the sky
And also mercury is in retrograde
And also I’m a Cancer rising so
Anyway that’s why I’m crying in a Wendy’s bathroom I guess
I want to wake up in that city that never sleeps
And find I’m king of the hill
Top of the heap
Overpaying on rent
Deeply in credit card debt
Do you think I’m smart enough to get into law school or should I just give up?
Come fly with me
Let’s Fly, let’s fly away
I read an article on BuzzFeed
That said spending money on experiences rather than things makes you happier
But I can’t stop thinking about the carbon footprint
Of this six-hour flight
We’re having a heatwave
A tropical heatwave
The ice caps are melting
I am on fire.