1.
Hercules: Slew the Nemean Lion.
Millennial Hercules: Cured his cat allergies using essential oils.
2.
Hercules: Slew the nine-headed Lernaean Hydra.
Millennial Hercules: Kept nine Tinder chats going at once.
3.
Hercules: Captured the Golden Hind of Artemis.
Millennial Hercules: Captured the golden HBO password of his parents.
4.
Hercules: Captured the Erymanthian Boar.
Millennial Hercules: Discovered the best vegan barbecue joint in the city.
5.
Hercules: Cleaned the Augean stables in a single day.
Millennial Hercules: Set a custom Roomba schedule.
6.
Hercules: Slew the Stymphalian Birds.
Millennial Hercules: Quit Twitter.
7.
Hercules: Captured the Cretan Bull.
Millennial Hercules: Invented a craft cocktail containing Red Bull.
8.
Hercules: Stole the Mares of Diomedes.
Millennial Hercules: Founded a bike share with his college roommate.
9.
Hercules: Obtained the belt of Hippolyta, Queen of the Amazons.
Millennial Hercules: Spent six hours reading customer reviews of a belt on Amazon.
10.
Hercules: Obtained the cattle of the monster Geryon.
Millennial Hercules: Signed at least twenty petitions to end factory farming.
11.
Hercules: Stole the apples of the Hesperides.
Millennial Hercules: Used his whole organic produce subscription box before it spoiled.
12.
Hercules: Captured and brought back Cerberus.
Millennial Hercules: Reached 60K Instagram followers for his rescue pit bull, @Cerberus.