The Girl With the Girly Girl Girdle

Contains the songs:

“The Girl With The Different Haircut”

“The Girl That I Saw On Some Form of Public Transport”

“That One Girl From My Foundation Course I Haven’t Mentioned Yet”

“The Girl Looking at Me Suspiciously Because I’m at Least 47 Years Old”


Picked Last in Life

Contains the songs:

“The Big Boys Who Keep Throwing Saveloys at Me "

“He Touched My Special Area”

“The Only Girl in School With a Bob Just Ran Off With My Worst Enemy”

“Getting Blistery in Double History”


Not So Christian As to Actually Scare You

Contains the songs:

“Je-suits You!”

“I Wasn’t Praying (Honestly, I Was Just Looking at That Distinctive Carpet Pattern)”

“Original Sin at the Premier Inn”

“Mathew, Mark, Luke and Johnny the Boy From the Garage With the Funny Eyes”


Getting Hassle (From Stephen Pastel)

Contains the songs:

“Talulah Gosh Almost”

“Might Be the BMX Bandits”

“Quick Smiths Rehash”

“Vaguely Human League”

“One With a Girl Singing”

“Suddenly Very Disco”


All Songs By the Other Guy

Contains the songs:

“Pretty Happy Lovely”

“Happy Lovely Lady”

“Lovely, Pretty, Happy”

“Happy, Lovely, Pretty, Happy”

“Love to Love Happiness”

“I Am the Deathbringer (My Confession)”


Nothing Valuable Left in This Van Morrison Overnight

Contains the songs:

“Cottage Cheese Louise”

“Cath With the Cough”

“Sometimes Limping Susan”

“Felicity the Philatelist”

“Almost Certainly Samantha”

“[Insert Activity] [Insert Girl’s Name]”


I Have Absolutely No Interest in Physical Sports

Contains the songs:

“Song About Some Old Flatmates of Mine”

“Song About a Walk I Took Once”

“Song About Those Trousers, You Know, the Maroon Ones”

“Song About What’s Happening Right In Front of Me Right Now”

“Song About My Innate Human Sadness”


(Way Way Too Old For) That Breton Top

Contains the songs:

“Who Needs Bandmates?”

“One Man Operation”

“I Can Probably Get That Trumpet Sound On My Synth”

“The Man Who Fitted the Carpet In my Home Studio Used to Play for Hamilton Academicals”

“Listening to My Own Records On a Dansette In the Park On a Sunny Day”


Sexualizing the Fey

Contains the songs:

“Waking Up to Whimsy”

“Havin’ a Tweesome”

“A Boy In the Bush”

“Man Crack”

“C69”


Music From the Film The Lost Art of Sighing

Contains the songs:

“A Girl On a Climbing Frame Looking Off Into the Distance”

“Oh My Goodness There’s a Party Scene!”

“Trying On Hats (Reprise)”

“Shouting At a Bus Stop”

“Inexplicable Dance Routine”


A Random Quote Possibly From Billy Liar

Contains the songs:

“Something Rita Tushingham Might Have Said Once”

“Every Line Clare Grogan Says in Gregory’s Girl

“Bits of Brautigan”

“I Think This Might Be From Beaches?”

“We’re Not Exactly Trying Any More”


Live From the Home

Contains the songs:

“Chair On Wheels”

“(I Think) That Orderly is Stealing My Pills”

“Rheumy In Here”

“Cateracting On Impulse”

“So Old, So Cold, So Tired”