“White wine, red wine. Who do I have to fuck to get a Capri Sun around here?”
“Now that you mention it, I have no idea who designed this shirt.”
“Does naming the work ‘Chaos’ belie the artist’s reliance upon a sparse, monochromatic field, or am I just a pretentious douchebag?”
“Well, that’s obvious, but what do the other three midgets represent?”
“Let me get this straight—the artist is gay and German? You just blew my mind.”
“I can’t. I have to work tomorrow.”