ILLUSTORIA MAGAZINE
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Articles by
Jessica M. Goldstein
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March 14, 2024Boeing Announces New Safety Policy: “Fuck It, We Ball”
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February 2, 2024A Day in the Life of Taylor Swift, as Imagined by Right-Wing Conspiracy Theorists
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June 27, 2022We’re the Supreme Court and, Honestly, We Just Want You All to Die
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December 2, 2021The Democratic Party’s Guide to Keeping Your Rights
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January 6, 2021Bridgerton’s Lady Whistledown Is Pleased to Announce She Is Joining Substack
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November 2, 2020Making Sure Your Vote Counts: A Guide
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June 1, 2020The City of Minneapolis Releases Statements of Probable Cause for Other Notable Violent Incidents
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November 14, 2019Introducing: Gender-Reveal Funerals
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June 19, 2019These Detention Centers Aren’t Concentration Camps Because Technically Auschwitz Is Trademarked
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May 17, 2019Honestly, We Just Hate Women
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April 22, 2019Creation: An Oral History
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March 18, 2019A Statement from the University of Pennsylvania Regarding the College Admissions Bribery Scandal
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November 6, 2024I Don’t Hate Women Candidates. I Just Thought an Erratic and Vindictive Criminal Was Worthier of My Vote Than a Woman Candidate
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November 8, 2024Updates on the Arc of the Moral Universe
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November 6, 2024Here’s Why a Second Death Star Won’t Be That Bad
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November 1, 2024I Will Be Away from My Desk on November 6
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November 15, 2024I’m Willing to Give Our Alien Overlords a Second Chance
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November 15, 2024I’m Robert F. Kennedy Jr., and It’s Time to Build a Healthcare System for 2025 BCE
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November 14, 2024I’m Putting Together a Team. The Worst Fucking Team of All Time
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November 14, 2024Names for Different Groups of Women