McSWEENEY'S INTERNET TENDENCY'S PATREON
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Articles by
Lucas Klauss
Lucas Klauss is a writer and dad in North Carolina. Slightly more information can be found at lucasklauss.com.
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July 24, 2018Welcome to Anxiety Dream High School
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March 1, 2013Gamify Your Life
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October 9, 2012Craig’s Artisanal Pickles Philosophy
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April 14, 2011The Seething Resentment Reading Series
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December 17, 2009Jazz Substandards
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November 13, 2008Modesty Plates
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July 17, 2008New York’s Best Child Doctors
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November 29, 2007Increasingly Dangerous Cheeses
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June 1, 2005Boner: Noun, Informal, a Blunder or an Error
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October 20, 2004Recent Occurrences at Owl Creek Bridge
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October 15, 2024I’m an Undecided Hobbit, Torn Between a Dark Lord Who Promises an Age of Chaos and an Elf Queen Whom I Just Wish I Knew More About
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September 20, 2024It’s Decorative Gourd Season, Motherfuckers
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August 19, 2024Lest We Forget the Horrors: A Catalog of Trump’s Worst Cruelties, Collusions, Corruptions, and Crimes: The Complete Listing: Atrocities 1–1,056
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October 28, 2024The Starfleet Gazette Will Not Be Endorsing a Candidate for President of the United Federation of Planets
Recently
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November 1, 2024I Will Be Away from My Desk on November 6
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November 1, 2024270 Reasons: Because on January 6, I Was More Afraid Working at the Capitol Than During My Entire Army Deployment to Iraq
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November 1, 2024Template for Donald Trump’s “I Don’t Accept the Election Results” Speeches
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October 31, 2024This Election Wouldn’t Be So Close If My Historically Unpopular Opponent Wasn’t Such a Shrewd Campaigner