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Articles by
Madeline Goetz
Madeline Goetz is a researcher for Late Night & a writer for earlier in the night. She lives in New York with her collie, Oskar, in an apartment she really can’t afford.
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November 13, 2024Rules for Our Cranberry Bog
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July 24, 2024Table Options for Your Dinner Reservation
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May 23, 2024I’m Voting for Him, Not Endorsing Him—There’s a Huge Difference
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June 12, 2023Our RV Has a Kitchen, Bedroom, Bathroom, and Plenty of Space for Our Seven Children
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April 25, 2023How to Hit It Off with My College Friend You’re About to Meet at This Party
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September 21, 2022Welcome to Our Cul-De-Sac
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February 28, 2022I Don’t Speak on Behalf of Other Politicians, Which Is a Practice I Definitely Didn’t Just Make Up to Avoid Talking about Trump Praising Putin
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February 11, 2022The Totally Normal and Perfectly Legal Ways We Stored Official White House Documents
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February 4, 2022Odyssey Cruise Lines Now Offering Competitive Rate of $21 an Hour for a Ten-Year Adventure
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September 3, 2021Do Not Feed the Duck—You Will Only Enable Him
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March 5, 2021Why I’m Selling My 4-Bed, 3-Bath, 37-Moving-Bookcase Home
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November 8, 2024Updates on the Arc of the Moral Universe
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November 6, 2024Here’s Why a Second Death Star Won’t Be That Bad
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November 6, 2024I Don’t Hate Women Candidates. I Just Thought an Erratic and Vindictive Criminal Was Worthier of My Vote Than a Woman Candidate
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November 8, 2024Finally, the Elites Have Been Defeated by the Billionaires