The Believer Magazine
Articles by
Melissa Pelletier
Melissa Pelletier lives in the suburbs of Long Island and she will be the first one to tell you, the suburbs are full of weird dogs. Dogs are weird. It’s all weird. But mostly her dog is the reason it’s weird.
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December 14, 2020The Haunting of White House
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November 12, 2019Positive Affirmations from the Main Character in a Victorian Gothic Novel
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November 17, 2017Guilt-Riddled Algebra
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September 7, 2017Ivanka Trump’s Mastering the Art of the Drop In
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June 29, 2017Melania Trump’s Tips for Combatting Cyberbullying
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June 13, 2017Tales From the Female Gaze
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February 10, 2025Voting for the Mayor Who Promised to Blow Up the City Doesn’t Mean I Approve of the Mayor Blowing Up the City
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February 5, 2025Here at DOGE, We’ve Streamlined Every Aspect of America’s Collapse
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February 13, 2025Finally, My Tax Dollars Are Being Used to Uncover Publicly Available Government Information
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February 4, 2025An Accurate Organizational Chart of Your University
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February 21, 2025Don’t Tread on Me—Unless You’re a Billionaire with a Ketamine Addiction, in Which Case I Enthusiastically Support It
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February 21, 2025Excerpts from The Believer: Finding Win Ng
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February 21, 2025Why I Chose to Reenter the Matrix and Be a Living Battery for the Machines
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February 20, 2025Take Him Seriously, Not Literally