The Believer Magazine
All posts tagged
elections
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November 4, 2024Don’t Worry—This Is Exactly How the Founding Fathers Intended You to Feel on Election Day
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November 3, 2024Based on Our Election Forecast, We Are 100 Percent Sure Anything Could Fucking Happen
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October 23, 2024A Stump Speech by a Mayoral Candidate Who Just Learned the Werewolves Terrorizing the Town Might Endorse Him
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July 22, 2024Sherwin-Williams Paint Color or Potential Kamala Harris Running Mate?
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June 20, 2024What I Would Do If I Got Off the Roof of This Office Building and Were Elected President
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March 29, 2024How to Concede an Election While Making It Clear That Your Ideas Are Objectively Better
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February 14, 2024As President, I Will Champion Gen X Rights
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November 7, 2023A Concession Speech by a Candidate Who Just Lost to a Dog Mayor
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October 24, 2023We Must Give Equal Airtime to the Democratic Incumbent and the Guy Who Wants Everyone to Drink Their Own Piss
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November 7, 2022Are You Watching Election Night Coverage or Preparing for a Colonoscopy?
Trending 🔥
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February 27, 2025“Democracy Dies in Darkness” Wasn’t a Warning; It Was Our End Goal
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March 10, 2025As an American Jew, I Feel Completely Reassured for My Safety Now That Trump Has Targeted the Epicenter of American Antisemitism, Columbia University
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February 27, 2025Changes Our University Is Making to Pre-Comply with Possible Future Regulations
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March 6, 2025Killing Baby Boomers Will Save the United States Government Trillions
Recently
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March 13, 2025It’s a Shame We Have to Betray Our Allies, Starve the Poor, Halt Scientific Progress, Destroy the Environment, and Eliminate the Freedoms Enshrined in the Bill of Rights, but at Least My Investment Portfolio Is Also Tanking
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March 13, 2025Don’t Let the Fact That I Only Criticize Democrats and Always Defend Trump Confuse You—I’m an Independent Centrist
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March 13, 2025Hero of the Memoir
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March 12, 2025DOGE-Inspired Spring Cleaning