Summer Blockbuster:
Escape From Tehran
Logline: The CIA infects an ex-con with an incurable strain of Swine Flu. In return for the antidote, he must first retrieve proof of Iran’s nuclear weapons program amidst post-election riots.

Summer Blockbuster:
American Pie 8
Logline: The next step is the goosestep. Unemployment and patriotism compel the boys from East Great Falls to enter Officer Candidate School in this war turn comedy political thriller.

Summer Blockbuster:
Three Kings 2: The Bonus Army
Logline: Facing foreclosure at home, a group of Army Reservists find buried treasure during “the Surge.”

Summer Blockbuster:
The Blair Witch Project 3
Logline: An unpopular prime minister leads Great Britain to war, but before he can unleash the dogs upon “the undiscovered country,” he must purge Parliament of infidels.

Summer Blockbuster:
All the President’s Women
Logline: Condoleeza Rice biopic. The many faces of the Secretary of State unfold during schizophrenic White House musical chairs.

Summer Blockbuster:
Saving Private Lynch
Logline: The 507th Maintenance Unit takes a wrong turn. The Special Operations sent to rescue them must first overcome high-tension wires as well as high tension.

Summer Blockbuster:
Baghdad Café 2
Logline: Troops take a wrong turn on an unmarked highway. They stop at a café for directions. However, they are snared in a Fedayeen house of horrors.

Summer Blockbuster:
An Iraqi and a Gentleman
Logline: An American drill sergeant attached to the NATO Training Mission at the Iraqi Military Academy meets his greatest challenge: turning ragtag and undisciplined cadets in to officers.

Summer Blockbuster:
The Texaco Kid
Logline: the Under-Vice President of Global Operations and Acquisitions, Strategic Sales and Services Division, is dispatched to postwar Iraq to strike a deal. Romance with the oil minister’s daughter complicates the contract. Soon more than oil is at stake.

Summer Blockbuster:
Bulletproof Grunts
Logline: In a race against time, military families send care packages of body armor to troops in Iraq.

Summer Blockbuster:
Braveheart 2: The Return of William Wallace
Logline: In Pattonesque bravado, Mel Gibson plays Third Infantry Division General William S. Wallace leading American cavalry in a desert campaign against the Iraqi Republican Guard. Beats shoveling shit in Louisiana.

Summer Blockbuster:
Dude Where’s My Car 2
Logline: Bagdad is encircled. Desperate to escape, a high-ranking member of the Baath Party loses his first car to a JDAM, his second car to the Fedayeen, and his third car to thieves.

Summer Blockbuster:
Babylon A.D. 2
Logline: Genetic engineering produces superhot self-fertilizing female soldiers that telekinetically locate IEDs. Sexual harassment on the ground as never before seen during war.

Summer Blockbuster:
The Quiet Ugly American
An embedded foreign journalist embedded with an American Army Civil Affairs Unit operating in Afghanistan chooses sides during a “hearts and minds” mission gone awry.

Summer Blockbuster:
An Inconvenient Truth 2
Logline: Stimulus package restimulates global warming. When the Air Force converts its stealth fleet to fly on biofuels, Al Gore races between prime-time interviews to rebuff the Greening of defense industries.

Summer Blockbuster:
A Few Good Men 2
BDSM is Legit, You Must Acquit. In the aftermath of Abu Ghraib Prison prisoner abuse, Larry Flynt hires a legal Dream Team led by Johnnie Cochrane to defend the 320th Military Police Battalion’s Constitutional right to produce and circulate war porn.

Summer Blockbuster:
One Flew Over the Cuckoo’s Nest 2
Logline: All-star cast. While Demi Moore (G.I. Jane) goes undercover to investigate a mysterious respiratory disease plaguing a secretive, privately-run, for-profit Veterans Hospital, she fends off Sylvester Stallone (Rambo VI), Arnold Schwartzenegger (Commando), Chuck Norris (Missing in Action), Martin Sheen (Apocalypse Now), Charlie Sheen (Platoon), Matthew Modine (Full Metal Jacket), Michael J. Fox (Casualties of War), Sean Penn (Casualties of War), Clint Eastwood (Firefox, Heartbreak Ridge), Mel Gibson (We Were Soldiers), Robert Duvall (Apocalypse Now), Christopher Walken (The Deer Hunter), Robert De Niro (The Deer Hunter), Forrest Whitaker (Platoon) and Russell Means (The Last of the Mohicans) testing high-tech prosthetics.

Summer Blockbuster:
Rambo VI aka Rambo III, pt. 2
Logline: Colonel Sam Trautman has been against the War on Terror from the beginning, resulting in his early retirement. However as the Army’s former leading expert on Afghanistan and trusted liaison to the various tribal warlords, at the special request of President Obama’s administration, he returns reluctantly to the war torn country to re-establish diplomatic ties with the Taliban. To no one’s surprise he is kidnapped, and tortured. Unbeknownst to Central Command, a close friend of the Colonel leaks the kidnapping to Rambo, retired somewhere in the American Southwest, and tells “the one-man-army” if the Colonel is not rescued within 72 hours, the subdermal GPS transponder will activate, thus prompting a surgical strike, in the process killing the Colonel and his supposedly high-value captors.