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The Second Trimester of Pregnancy, as Described to Women in Their First Trimester
“Morning sickness is soooo much better in the second trimester. For example, you may get it only in the morning.” -
This Threat to Democracy Must Be Certified
“We must never forget what happened that day. We must tell of its violence in our history books and teach of its blight to our children so it may never be repeated. Except today, when we need to come together and agree on one thing: That guy should be in charge.” -
Introducing Georg Property, the Long-Lost Third Property Brother
JONATHAN: I think we should redo the roof first.
DREW: I’m all about bringing these floors back to their glory days.
GEORG: Have you ever eaten tiger prawns on the burnished gold sands of Tahiti’s shores? I, Georg Property, have long known such carnal delights. -
Lists
Local Alternatives to “California Sober”
California sober: No alcohol or drugs except marijuana
New York sober: No alcohol or drugs except cocaine
Maine sober: No addictive drugs except lobster rolls -
Project 2025
Was Inside Us All Along“New year, new you,” they say. Well, Project 2025 is going to make what’s new actually really fucking old.
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January 1, 2025Class Is Canceled Until Further Notice While I Do My Job
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January 3, 2025Local Alternatives to “California Sober”
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January 1, 2025Our 24 Most-Read Pieces of 2024
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December 19, 2024A Producer Attempts to Pitch The Nutcracker
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December 24, 2024The Twelve Days of Christmas
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April 18, 2024Writer Math
Interviews, Essays, and Excerpts
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January 7, 2025Short Conversations with Poets: Carol Moldaw
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December 18, 2024Donations Matched One-to-One This Week. Please Consider Giving in Honor of a Reader in Your Life.
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December 13, 2024Excerpts from The Believer: Ancient to the Future
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December 11, 2024Letters to Moms: A Letter to Kevin McCallister’s Mom
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December 6, 2024Excerpts from The Believer: An Interview with Musician Jack Stratton
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December 4, 2024Announcing the International Library of Youth Writing
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November 29, 2024Excerpts from The Believer: Resurrector: Signs
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To order this title for just five dollars when you subscribe to The Believer, click here. A collection of riotously entertaining columns, written for The Believer magazine during its years in...
Recent Posts
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January 2, 2025A Jane Austen Heroine’s New Year’s Resolutions
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January 1, 2025Class Is Canceled Until Further Notice While I Do My Job
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January 1, 2025Our 24 Most-Read Pieces of 2024
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December 24, 2024The Twelve Days of Christmas
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December 23, 2024The Three Kings Arrive, but One of Them Brings a Shaq-a-Roni Pizza Instead of Myrrh
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