The New Superstitions: M&M Colors and the Conditions They Cause - McSweeney’s Internet Tendency

Internet Tendency

Daily humor almost every day since 1998.

Daily humor almost every day since 1998.

The Believer Magazine

Subscribe today to climb aboard this unstoppable train of a literary journal.

Blue: Tuberculosis

Green: Baker’s cyst

Yellow: Goiter

Brown: Detached retina

Orange: Rickets

Red: Severe risk of terrorist attack

Please help support our writers and keep our site ad-free by becoming a patron.

Become a patron

Subscribe to McSweeney’s Internet Tendency’s Substack

Suggested Reads

October 18, 2012

Seasonal Candy Affective Disorder

by Lauren Le Vine
February 13, 2024

Cormac McCarthy’s Valentine’s Day Candy Hearts

by Kristina Libby and Timothy Cahill
October 31, 2007

Signs Above My Halloween Candy: 1996–2006

by Zach Oberman
November 11, 2011

History’s a Bitch: A Dog Walk Through Time: Man Weds Dog

by Robb Fritz

Trending 🔥

December 4, 2024

Your 2024 Therapy Wrapped

by Sasha Lubomirsky, Topher Lin, and Chan Lin
December 3, 2024

A Faculty Member’s Self-Evaluation at the End of the Semester

by B. McNulty
December 6, 2024

We Need to Save the Men

by Ginny Hogan
December 10, 2024

A Typical First Date with a Guy in Boston, Chicago, or New York

by Jus Kaplan, Jonah Nink, and Jack Stebbins

Recently

December 20, 2024

Great Philosophers on Santa’s Naughty and Nice Lists

by Amanda Lehr
December 20, 2024

An Art Nouveau Calendar for a Terrible Fucking Year

by Ali Fitzgerald
December 19, 2024

An Open Letter to Sarah from Love Actually, to Be Delivered In the Two Seconds Before She Answers Her Phone for the Second Time While Karl Is Tenderly Dry Humping Her

by Una LaMarche
December 19, 2024

A Producer Attempts to Pitch The Nutcracker

by Jeff Bender