Having a fucking bake sale
Building a fucking shed in your own backyard
Pumping fucking gas
Getting a fucking vasectomy
Owning a fucking car
Driving someone else’s fucking car
Riding in a fucking car
Disposing of fucking batteries
Cutting fucking hair for a living
Having a controlled bonfire on your own fucking property
Owning a fucking dog
Walking a fucking dog
Selling a fucking mattress
Watching a fucking DVD
Holding any sort of public fucking performance
Importing foreign fucking cheese
Changing your last fucking name to your spouse’s
Buying fucking fireworks
Riding a fucking bicycle
Having a fucking swimming pool
Xeroxing and distributing copyrighted fucking material
Transporting a bottle of opened fucking wine home from a restaurant
Using a fucking skateboard
Buying unpasteurized fucking milk
Recycling
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