The Believer Magazine
Articles by
Pat Cassels
Pat Cassels is an Emmy-winning writer and actor. He is a former staff writer for Full Frontal with Samantha Bee and CollegeHumor, and was a consultant on the first season of Adam Ruins Everything. He’s contributed to The New Yorker, Los Angeles Review of Books, and The New York Times, and writes a column for Atlas Obscura.
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March 5, 2025I Am Trapped in the Criterion Closet
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January 3, 2025Local Alternatives to “California Sober”
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November 19, 2024The Story of the First No-Nut November
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March 5, 2024J. Robert Oppenheimer Is Gonna Party His Ass Off at the Oscars
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October 16, 2023What Do We Want…?
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August 30, 2023Say What You Want About Joseph Stalin, At Least He Wasn’t Old
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August 8, 2023Sorry to Interrupt This Wilco Festival, but There Are Some Bad IPAs Going Around
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March 2, 2007Words Never Used in the Titles of Remotely Good Films
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February 14, 2007Tom Skerritt’s Speech to the Cadets in Top Gun Is Probably Long Enough as It Is
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August 26, 2005Totalitarian Institutions That Would Have Been More Fitting for George Orwell’s 1984, Considering How That Year Turned Out
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June 24, 2005The Extended Family of Thespian Rip Torn
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May 18, 2005Embarrassing Things That Might Happen to You While Using a Lightsaber
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March 24, 2025Lest We Forget the Horrors: An Unending Catalog of Trump’s Cruelties, Collusions, Corruptions, and Crimes
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March 18, 2025Senator Schumer Votes to Let the Big Wooden Horse into Troy
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March 26, 2025Excerpts from a Red-Hot Right-Wing Romance Novel
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March 25, 2025The Plan to Bomb the Middle East Finally Made It Out of the Group Chat
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April 2, 2025We’re Committed to Brokering Peace in Ukraine; Also We’re Invading Greenland
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April 2, 2025Increasingly Inconvenient MTA Service Advisories
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April 1, 2025I’m a German Citizen in 1933, and Is It Just Me or Is It Really Hard to Get Any Work Done Right Now?
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April 1, 2025An Open Letter to ICE Regarding My Potential Disappearance