McSWEENEY'S INTERNET TENDENCY'S PATREON
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All posts tagged
5th-grade
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June 10, 2022We Are Sending an Obscene Amount of Stuff Home with Your Child on the Last Day of School
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October 14, 2021I Am Worried That My Fifth-Grade Research Report on Abraham Lincoln Will Have No Lasting Impact
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June 17, 2019Towns in Pennsylvania or My Google Searches in 5th Grade?
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December 7, 2003Short Essays on Favorite Songs, Inspired by Nick Hornby’s Songbook: Richard Marx’s “Hazard.”
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February 10, 2025Voting for the Mayor Who Promised to Blow Up the City Doesn’t Mean I Approve of the Mayor Blowing Up the City
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February 21, 2025Don’t Tread on Me—Unless You’re a Billionaire with a Ketamine Addiction, in Which Case I Enthusiastically Support It
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February 27, 2025“Democracy Dies in Darkness” Wasn’t a Warning; It Was Our End Goal
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February 13, 2025Finally, My Tax Dollars Are Being Used to Uncover Publicly Available Government Information
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March 3, 2025Other Things John Jacob Jingleheimer Schmidt Wished People Shouted at Him
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February 28, 2025An Open Letter to Lumon Industries Requesting to Please Kindly Insert the Severance Device in My Brain and Keep It on “Innie” Mode for the Next Four Years
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February 28, 2025Excerpts from The Believer: Resurrector: Black Square
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February 28, 2025The New Cair Paravel Times Editorial Board Reflects on the First Weeks of the White Witch’s Second Reign