McSWEENEY'S INTERNET TENDENCY'S PATREON
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All posts tagged
paris-hilton
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August 15, 2011Non-Essential Mnemonics: Most Tourists Can’t Distinguish Between the Famous Hilton Sisters and Random Other Slutty Celebrity Starlets. Paris, Nicky, Lindsay Lohan, Heidi Pratt, Whoever Else—All are Identically Classless to the Typical Foreigner
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March 3, 2011“Song of Myself 2011: Celebrity Heiress Edition.”
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January 20, 2008The Convergences Contest: Carnival of Convergences No. 5
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November 28, 2006Mike Richardson-Bryan’s Five Stages of Grief: Paris Hilton
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October 4, 2005Sestina: We’ll Always Have Paris Hilton
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April 21, 2004Sestina: Cowboys
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February 10, 2025Voting for the Mayor Who Promised to Blow Up the City Doesn’t Mean I Approve of the Mayor Blowing Up the City
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February 21, 2025Don’t Tread on Me—Unless You’re a Billionaire with a Ketamine Addiction, in Which Case I Enthusiastically Support It
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February 27, 2025“Democracy Dies in Darkness” Wasn’t a Warning; It Was Our End Goal
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February 13, 2025Finally, My Tax Dollars Are Being Used to Uncover Publicly Available Government Information
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March 3, 2025Accurate College Marketing Taglines
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March 3, 2025Other Things John Jacob Jingleheimer Schmidt Wished People Shouted at Him
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February 28, 2025An Open Letter to Lumon Industries Requesting to Please Kindly Insert the Severance Device in My Brain and Keep It on “Innie” Mode for the Next Four Years
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February 28, 2025Excerpts from The Believer: Resurrector: Black Square