Days that Paul Ryan will have been in Congress when he retires on January 3, 2019: 7367
Days Paul Ryan will have been Speaker of the House: 1163
Average price of a new car: $32,086
Rank, in number of employees, of Walmart: 1st
Days an average Walmart worker will need to work to buy a new car: 572.96
Days per year that Paul Ryan will wear his polo collars popped during his retirement: 365
Average number of polos Paul Ryan will wear when he wears polos: 3
Number of times Journey’s “Don’t Stop Believin’” will be played at Paul Ryan retirement parties and galas: 8,452
Percentage of guests who will sing loudly along with Journey every time “Don’t Stop Believin’” plays: 100%
Percentage of Paul Ryan’s bros who call him the “Speaker-inator”: 100%
Number of bills that Paul Ryan introduced in 2017: 2
Number of bills that Paul Ryan co-sponsored in 2017: 2
Number of ounces in Axe Body Spray for Men’s Dark Temptation fragrance: 4
Number of bottles of Axe body spray that Paul Ryan’s bros will wear during Paul Ryan retirement parties and galas: 4,987
Number of buttons on Paul Ryan’s bros’ shirts that will be unbuttoned when Paul Ryan’s retirement parties and galas begin: 2
Average number of buttons on Paul Ryan’s bros’ shirts that will be unbuttoned when the sauce starts to kick in at Paul Ryan’s retirement parties and galas: 6.5
Percentage of bros who will tie their neckties around their heads by the end of Paul Ryan’s retirement parties and galas: 100%
Area Code in Paul Ryan’s hometown of Janesville, WI: 603
Dollars the National Rifle Association has given to Paul Ryan: $171,977
Median annual public school teacher salary in Janesville: $54,595
Number of times Paul Ryan’s bros have flexed and referred to their biceps as a “gun show”: 9,765,103
Number of pounds Paul Ryan is lifting with his muscles in the infamous October 2012 issue of Time magazine photo: 50
Area in square miles of Lake Michigan: 22,394
Chances that Paul Ryan will get a boat and take that bad boy out on Lake Michigan every Sunday: 100%
Number of people in Wisconsin’s 1st Congressional District: 715,327
Average tax cut a middle-class family will get from the Tax Cuts and Jobs Act of 2017: $1,182
Cost of 2018 Carver 52 Coupe motor yacht for sale in Sturgeon Bay, WI on boattrader.com: $1,199,000
Percentage of times Miley Cyrus’s “Party in the U.S.A.” will play on Paul Ryan’s new boat whenever he takes it out onto Lake Michigan: 100%
Amount Paul Ryan received from BlackRock Inc. in 2017: $110,100.00
Assets under management by BlackRock, Inc.: $28,600,000,000.00
Drop in corporate tax rate under new tax law: 14%
Amount Paul Ryan received from retirees in his district in 2017-2018: $1,495,904
Number of beer cans in the 30 packs of Old Milwaukee that Paul Ryan’s bros will bring to his yacht: 30
Standard length of beer pong table: 8 feet
Number of cups in standard beer pong pyramid formation: 10
Amount that the new tax bill will add to the deficit over the next ten years according to the Congressional Budget Office: $1,446,700,000,000.00
Number of times Paul Ryan has called himself a “deficit hawk”: Who even cares — it’s bullshit
Amount the Koch brothers donated Paul Ryan’s fundraising committee after the GOP tax plan passed: $500,000
Number of days between when Paul Ryan’s tax bill passed and the Koch brothers’ donation: 13
Times Paul Ryan has addressed the Koch brothers and nearly addressed them as “Koch bros”: All of them
Days until Paul Ryan’s retirement: 265 days
Amount of money that the average Walmart worker will make in that time: $12,114.28