1. “Pugs in the Sun”
(Tune: “Riders on the Storm” by The Doors)

Pugs in the sun
Pugs in the sun
Into these rays they’re going
Into this nap they’re thrown
Like a narcoleptic man
Who really wants a tan
Pugs in the sun

2. “Copugcabana”
(Tune: “Copacabana” by Barry Manilow)

Her name was Lola, she was a show pug
With oil gloss in her hair and a collar cut down to there
She would trot straight lines and square her pasterns
And while she tried to be the best
Her handler never let her rest
Across the Astroturf, they worked until it hurt
She was young and she was a Winners Bitch
Who could ask for more?

3. “Pug in Trouble in the Water”
(Tune: “Bridge Over Troubled Water” by Simon & Garfunkel)

When you’re sleepy, about to fall
And you need half the queen size, I’ll take it all
I’m on your side of the bed, whoa, perpendicular
A pillow can’t be found
Like a pug in trouble in the water
I will thrash around
Like a pug in trouble in the water
I will make weird sounds

4. “Sweet Pug O’ Mine”
(Tune: “Sweet Caroline” by Neil Diamond)

Sweet pug o’mine
Weekends never seemed so good
I’d be inclined
To never leave the house again
But now I
Look at my life and it don’t seem so sterile
You filled it up with dander and poo
And when I sneeze
Sneezing runs off my shoulders
How can I sneeze when I’m huffing you?

5. “Sweet Pug O’ Mine”
(Tune: “Sweet Child O’ Mine” by Guns N’ Roses)

She’s got eyes of the biggest size
As if they took x-rays
I love to look into those eyes
When they point in different ways
Her ears remind me of a velvet drape
Until you look inside
They’re full of black wax
And Q-tips
You need four or five

Oh, oh, oh
Sweet pug o’ mine
Oh, oh, oh, oh
Sweet pug of mine

6. “Aquapug”
(Tune: “Aqualung” by Jethro Tull)

Sitting on a dog park bench
Eyeing little pugs with no heat vents
Tongues hanging as they drool
Waiting their turn for the kiddie pool, hey, Aquapug

Drying in the hot sun
Watching as the heavy breathers run, hey, Aquapug
Laughing at the dirty mucks
Looking as graceful as a bread truck, oh, Aquapug

7. “Ain’t Talkin’ ‘Bout Pugs”
(Tune: “Ain’t Talkin’ ‘Bout Love” by Van Halen)

You know you’re semi-housebroken
And off the streets at last
Oh yeah, you think you’ve really landed, puppy
You better find yourself a pal, my pal

Ain’t talkin’ ‘bout pugs
My pug is rotten to the core
Ain’t talkin’ ’bout pugs
Just like I told you before, before, before

8. “Could You Be Pugged”
(Tune: “Could You Be Loved” by Bob Marley and the Wailers)

Could you be pugged and be pugged?
Could you be pugged and be pugged?

Don’t let them retool ya
Or obedience school ya
Oh, no
We’ve got a style all our own
So go to hell if you’re thinking that we need a nose
Evolution would never let us down
A-yin the breeding there must come out the woes

Could you be pugged and be pugged?
Could you be pugged, wo now! and be pugged?

9. “One Pug Leads to Another”
(Tune: “One Thing Leads to Another” by The Fixx)

The perception is crass, just what are you trying to say?
They’ve got a flat face, which irrigates
Communicate, pull out your parti pris
You see dimensions in vet bills
State your case with black or fawn
But when one little bug leads to shots, split the fee
You run for cover so to flee, why don’t you

Do what you say, say what you mean, and baby
One pug leads to another
You warned something was wrong, I know I waffled too long but then
One pug leads to another

10. “Neunundneunzig Pugballons”
(Tune: “99 Luftballons” by Nena)

Neunundneunzig pugballons
Auf ihrem Weg zum Horizont
Fravor dachte UFOs aus dem Weltraum
Darum schickte ein General
Mulder und Scully hinterher
Hundepfeife zu geben, wenn es so wär
Dabei war’n da am Horizont
Nur neunundneunzig pugballons