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Introducing the Willy-Nilly System of Governance
“We’re doing just whatever we feel like with no foresight, illustrating one of the Willy-Nilly System’s central tenets: There are no wrong answers because we should not assess any of our decisions before implementing them.” -
“He’s Just Trolling Us,” I Say as I Pay Two Hundred Dollars for Eggs and Our Town Gets Measles for the Second Year in a Row
“The mainstream media takes him too seriously. The truth is, it’s all a big overreaction to some good old-fashioned gags.” -
Let’s Save Western Civilization by Being Cruel Motherfuckers
“Fending off starvation in Ethiopia and providing clean water in Colombia was completely crippling Western civilization, taking away precious funds we should be using to buy crypto.” -
As an American Jew, I Feel Completely Reassured for My Safety Now That Trump Has Targeted the Epicenter of American Antisemitism, Columbia University
“We all know Columbia is American antisemitism’s ground zero. It couldn’t be bothered to appoint a Jewish member of its Board of Trustees until 1784 and has only been led by Jewish presidents for a mere thirty-four of the past forty-five years.” -
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Kirkus Reviews of Trump’s Second Term
“Horrible character development. It’s nearly impossible to believe these people are real.”
Trending
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February 27, 2025“Democracy Dies in Darkness” Wasn’t a Warning; It Was Our End Goal
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February 27, 2025Changes Our University Is Making to Pre-Comply with Possible Future Regulations
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February 26, 2025An Updated Guide to Generations
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March 6, 2025Killing Baby Boomers Will Save the United States Government Trillions
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February 10, 2025Voting for the Mayor Who Promised to Blow Up the City Doesn’t Mean I Approve of the Mayor Blowing Up the City
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March 7, 2025Happy National Women’s Day from the White House
Interviews, Essays, and Excerpts
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March 7, 2025Excerpts from The Believer: Stuff I’ve Been Reading: Winter 2024
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March 5, 2025Short Conversations with Poets: Dong Li
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February 28, 2025Excerpts from The Believer: Resurrector: Black Square
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February 21, 2025Excerpts from The Believer: Finding Win Ng
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February 20, 2025Mac Barnett Has Been Named 2025-26 National Ambassador for Young People’s Literature
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February 19, 2025Short Conversations with Poets: Matthew Zapruder
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February 14, 2025Excerpts from The Believer: The Joy of Persona
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